I take joy in finding out that the ex that f-ed around on me 3 times while we were dating now appears to be divorced from the first guy she married, and is now apparently married to the guy she f-ed around with all three times we were dating. I am happy because a) she obviously really really liked the guy and b) now I know that it really was her, and not me. I beat the sh!t out of myself for so long, trying to figure out what I did wrong to drive her to cheat, and now I see that she had the problem, not me! I actually feel better. Is that messed up??

Anyhow, I'm going to Maine for a week, so if you don't hear from me, that's why.

Not that I am a especially vocal part of the community here lately, but you know what I mean...


Two Replies to 30-VI-2009 or Is it wrong to be happy?

Amy Austin | June 30, 2009
I don't know, Aaron... I mean, *I* don't think it is -- but then I myself am dying here for the same sort of validation about a situation that I am still far from being "over". I regularly beat the shit out of myself, too, for the same reasons you mention... as well as the fact that I cannot wish well (in fact, I even wish ill) for the people who have hurt me so badly. If it truly is messed up, then know that I am just as messed up (maybe much more) right along with you. That may or may not give you any comfort, I know. ;-\

Jackie Mason | July 1, 2009
[hidden by author request]


MiracleASSassin

Aaron Shurtleff uses this area as a dumping ground for his random thoughts... Read more »

11-VIII-2006 or Scutellum with Sublateral Grooves

Just a random part of an identification key for parasitic wasps I'm struggling with at work today. Random titles are hard to come up with some days. :( Well, who loves working overtime? Go »

2-VII-2008 or Quick Hits

1) At the bottom of my Dashboard, it says: You are not currently playing a concert with Amy Austin. Yea. And I ain't gonna! Go »

17-I-2007 or Henry Rollins ain't got nothing on me!

So, the results are in, and I'm still walking the streets, so that's good...maybe. I really should have seen this coming, but I did exceptional on the test...sort of. Go »

10-V-2008 or Thrash Unreal!

I'm really getting into the band Against Me!. (Do you put in a period in a case like this, where the band name ends in a punctuation mark??) I really like the song Thrash Unreal (I wish I could karaoke it! Go »

27-X-2006 or There's still a feeling of rejection...

...when someone says she prefers the company of others to your exclusive company. The song of the day is "Popular" by Nada Surf. Go »

2-X-2008 or Oh, YEAH!

That's why I stopped playing the Devil in Rock Block! I knew there was some reason... Go »