All of this landscaping has taken a serious toll on my aged body, apparently. I actually had to take a day off from work to recover from an aching back. When younger (twenties), I could chop a load of firewood blah blah blah. Same old "old guy lament", I know. It's just rearing its ugly head more and more lately. I don't exercise except playing with the kids, I don't eat well regularly (adult type Happy Meals still make me happy), and I stay up waaaaay too late so I suffer from poor sleeping habits. I find myself becoming nostalgic for old Geritol commercials and trying to remember what's in that shit. I need something. I can't call my boss and request another day off because I can't tie my shoes again. She's gonna start thinking dementia soon. Being a late father (first kid at 39) isn't helping with my energy. I just constantly feel like my cellphone with only one bar displayed. This rambling blog entry is a perfect example of how addled my thinking is of late. Maybe I should start eating that Icelandic fermented shark stuff. Foods that smell like ammonia might work like smelling salts and keep me alert.


Five Replies to I'm Too Young To Be Old

Scott Hardie | October 15, 2009
Would it help to force yourself to eat regularly and sleep regularly? We've been doing that lately after getting sick from not taking care of our basic health, and it has made a difference in feeling normal again.

The late-parent thing might get better. My parents had me at 38, and I was as boisterous as other kids in my early years, but by adolescence I had mellowed out and become a quiet kid by virtue of living in a mellow, quiet household. I knew my parents couldn't or wouldn't take me on roller coasters or let me have parties with friends or do other wild kid activities. I'm sure you're raising considerate kids, so they should grow to respect your limits too.

Steve West | October 15, 2009
That's welcome advice. I can alter my eating and sleeping habits, sure. I should and I'm sure I will out of necessity. That late parent thing I can't change. Lauren was followed by Olivia when I was 41. While I don't regret anything about them, slowing down is slightly more difficult with the needs entailed in Olivia's autism. How considerate she'll even be able to be remains to be seen. I'll start with what I can change and remain hopeful about things I cannot. Thanks.

Steve Dunn | October 15, 2009
Have you considered the use and abuse of recreational drugs? Stimulants are probably best for the symptoms you describe (cocaine, meth, speed) but you'll want to keep some downers on hand for balance and sleeping.

Steve West | October 15, 2009
Now I feel like the guy who is asked if he has any naked pictures of his wife. When I indignantly reply, "Of course not", I get the immediate follow-up question, "Wanna buy some?" Drugs and me are definitely yesterday. Thanks for the suggestion!

Amy Austin | October 16, 2009
Wink, wink... nudge, nudge.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Yes, I Would Like A Second Helping

Blasts from the past. Really bad album covers. Lame creatures from Star Trek. Go »

Knock Knock Knockin' On Morpheus' Door

Nestled in the arms of Hypnos, my daughter woke me with the sounds of retching. She is struggling with a very phlegmy cough that makes sleeping difficult for her and impossible for me. What with all the changing of bedding in the middle of the night, clothing, dosing with medicine, and comforting - I lost a significant amount of sleep. Go »

What'd I Step In?

Things stuck to the bottom of my internet shoe. Things not to do while wearing briefs made of beef jerky. (Besides wearing briefs made of beef jerky) Venezuelans believe children should not watch The Simpsons, offer more wholesome fare instead. Go »

For Your Consideration...

So many actors are on their best behaviour come Oscar time because they don't want anything to interfere with their chances to win in this rare opportunity. The rarest of opportunities occurs this year for Mickey Rourke who is not exactly on a first name basis with Oscar nominations. And may never be there again. Go »

Do Pumpkins Exist Outside Of These Fall Holidays?

They should. I love the taste of homemade pumpkin pie. I almost didn't marry Brenda when she told me she couldn't make one but I thankfully reconsidered. Go »

Take Me Out...

It was baseball night in Bowie. As part of Lauren's tenth birthday celebration, we went to see the Bowie Baysox. Highlights of the evening included: Nearly getting nailed by a foul ball while distracted by getting pizza sauce off my pants. Go »