Obama Criticizes Obama Over Rising Gas Prices
by Scott Hardie on April 24, 2011

I was going to share this fake news article that I drafted in a chat with friends...
Stopped at a DC-area gas station to fill up his motorcade, President Obama groaned as he watched the numbers climbing ever higher on the pump. "God, why don't I get off my ass and do something about the price of gas?" he said to himself. "What am I doing that's so important? Aren't I supposed to be fixing this economy already?" The president shifted his weight and elaborated. "I should probably get tough on the Saudis and just tell them to sell us oil cheaper if they know what's good for them. Oh, wait! Isn't there, like, some strategic reserve or something that I could tap? I should definitely open that up. Americans are losing their jobs!" Twisting shut the cap on his gas tank, Obama speculated about his motives. "Maybe I don't take this seriously because we didn't have to worry about gas where I grew up in Kenya."...but then the administration made this announcement and gave the appearance of "doing something." Reality is sadder than fiction.
One Reply to Obama Criticizes Obama Over Rising Gas Prices
Logical Operator
The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

Wests Take Southwest to Southeast
As Steve West mentioned, he and Brenda recently visited Sarasota for a week of fun. In advance, we rented an AirBNB (cat allergies prevented staying at my place) and kicked around some ideas for what to do, but we were concerned about unpredictable fatigue and other medical complications and knew that we had to take it one day at a time. The trip had a bumpy start, with Kelly taken by ambulance to the ER the night before (she recovered quickly) and a difficult Southwest flight and Uber pickup for the Wests, but that all quickly felt like it was behind us as soon as the fun began. Go »
Tom's Ball Smells Like Apple Pie
For the last four months, I've spent Tuesdays at a bowling alley playing in a just-for-fun league. Score was kept, but the mood was friendly and non-competitive, except for one of my teammates who kept competing with us instead of the other teams. :-) I struggled with it at first, partly because I thought I was signing up for a six-week league and it turned out to be a sixTEEN-week league, and partly because my skills had somehow diminished even though I'm in better shape now. Go »
At Least It's Better Than Bra
You know what sucks, bro? Reading this article a couple of times and later discovering that "bro" has leaked into your everyday speech. Go »
The Weekend of Soup
This has been a miserable week. Monday: I woke up dizzy with a high fever and couldn't stay standing up. There were no cold or flu symptoms, but it wouldn't go away, so I worked the day from home. Go »
R.I.P. Mom
You were so still in your bed when I could finally sit down beside you, a few hours after the facility notified me that you had died. I hadn't seen you be that peaceful in years, your eyes not scanning the room for clues, your hands not turning over each object in front of you for endlessly repeated examination. I whispered to you the most urgent and most precious things I had to say, the secrets and atonements and wishes foremost on my mind. Go »










Jackie Mason | April 29, 2011
[hidden by author request]