Out of the Closet and into the Stratosphere
by Steve West on April 8, 2013

So Tom Cruise wants to go into outer space and meet aliens. I think I can scrounge together a few bucks for a one-way ticket. Any other takers?

One Reply to Out of the Closet and into the Stratosphere

Scott Hardie | April 8, 2013
Oy... When you hear it like that, coming out of the mouth of Mr. Crazy Time Scientology Man, belief in aliens seems less likely than I thought.

It would take me paragraphs to explain the joke, but longtime fans of South Park may chuckle at how Tom Cruise got his wish to go into space.

Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

These People Really Hate Tomatoes

Random quote: "I accedentially (sic) ate a cherry tomato in my salad once,and now I worship satan." I personally like tomatoes and find it incredible that anyone can have such passion in either direction; love or hate. About tomatoes, I mean. Go »

My First Baby Got Married

WE ARE BACK! What a trip. Five flights, countless hours in layovers, endless treks from gate to gate, sometimes in limited timeframes, no meals except for snacks on the planes and no Wi-fi! Go »

Christmas Post #16: A Hillbilly Christmas

My father was born and raised in North Carolina. Throughout my childhood we would make the summer trek to my Granny and Grandpaw's house in the middle of the state. Many a summer night passed listening to roosters (they crow all friggin' night), the occasional gator grunt, and my hillbilly cousins fart and scratch while playing cards. Go »

Kinderfest

Brenda and I were going to take the girls sailing but there was rain in the forecast so we decided to put it off for a week. Rainy combined with slightly chilly (60 degrees) doesn't make for a good time outside of Wasilla. So we decided to go to Kinderfest at a local regional park. Go »

If I Were To Make A Children's Show...

...it would be similar to this promo for The Crime Channel featuring Gali the Alligator. The lyrics are a little hard to understand so I've attempted to transcribe them here. Go »

Vacation Week II

Took the girls to a petting zoo where they could not only look at the animals but interact as well. Saw some things of interest to me; an albino peacock (well, I don't know if it was albino but it was all white); petted a llama (their hair is kinda rough); the world's fattest rabbit (big as a poodle!); pigs, cows, horses, donkeys, turkeys & chickens & roosters (oh, my); a beautiful garden of vegetables and flowers; and lots of ducks and geese. Go »

Welcome to Funeratic!

Please log in or register to get started.

Learn more about the website.