My God, bowling has gotten expensive. Sorry to speak of the costs of things so much but hey, this is a getting a little ridiculous. One game cost me $17.00. $17.00 and I don't get to take anything home with me. Sure it was fun but for that kind of money I want a case of scotch to go with it! Three games for the four of us would have cost $40.00 not counting the shoe rental, but Olivia was done after one. We came home after the one game which took an hour because of Olivia's slow play. She's still at that legs spread, two-handed pendulum kick start stage of bowling. Lauren was so proud of herself for getting a better score than Brenda did and Brenda tried to use the excuse of the girls taking advantage of the gutter bumpers. I told her the bumpers were there for her too, so she could have used them. She threatened to put a certain part of my anatomy in the ball polisher, if you know what I'm saying.

After lunch, it was time for a couple hours at kiddie heaven - Chuck E. Cheese's! The girls are hilarious there. Olivia throws the skee balls over-handed when I'm not looking. Lauren crawls throught the tunnels and stops at each window to wave and/or make sure I'm still watching. We took turns in the Chuckie sketch booth and the results weren't bad.

Me & Lauren


Brenda & Olivia


Lauren opted for these goofy glasses as her ticket collection reward.


Olivia wisely opted for a lollipop. Hershey Park tomorrow. God give me strength.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Just My Lucky Day, I Guess

Weekly shopping trips have been largely uneventful of late because of the absence of you know who, UOAS. She kind of startled me with her presence at the Safeway tonight and I wondered if God specifically was observing my sense of satisfaction over her MIA status. She noted my surprised expression and commented, "Long time no see!" Go »

Some Anniversaries Are More Memorable Than Others

Today is the ninth anniversary of my wedding to my child bride, Brenda. So far so good. Had to call and schedule the plumber because there is water leaking from behind the wall in the bathroom. Go »

Where's Joe The Plumber When I Need Him?

Screw plumbing! This is friggin' ridiculous. When the toilet in my bedroom bath developed a leak, I assured my wife it was a simple repair to replace the fill valve. Go »

Apparently, Some Visuals are Best Left Undescribed

Recent conversation with Brenda: me: I was thinking about Star Wars stuff the other day and I can't help but see this mental image of the Empire State Building wielding a light sabre and waving it at King Kong. You know, The Empire Strikes Back. Brenda: Have you taken your meds today? Go »

Christmas and a Lizard's Tale

One Christmas when Lauren was eight, like a lot of girls her age, wished for a pony. My backyard at the time was about the size of a Volkswagen Minibus. Despite her assurances that she would let it roam the neighborhood for sufficient exercise, I said, “Not this year,” as I pictured myself following the horse with a pooper scooper. Go »

Dumb Celebrity Quotes

Anyone can say something stupid every once in a while, of course. But the celebrities featured on this website sure seem to make a habit of it. Only one quote per customer but they probably make up the usual suspects in the dumb quote hall of shame. Go »