The bad news: I have a miserable cold (thanks Charlotte) and I slept for an hour last night.

The good news: I had to speak in front of a hundred people today.

Why is that good? Because every once in a while, my company asks me to host an event, and I get to boost my stature while doing something I love, which is making a crowd laugh. Today's occasion was a roast for the longtime HR director upon her retirement. Nothing is more fun than getting to rip into the senior executives in public and getting laughs instead of worrying about a pink slip. And when it's a roast, there's no such thing as too mean. Let the individual speakers pay the compliments and go for the warm fuzzies; I'm there for the zingers.

I was afraid having a cold was going to sink it at the last minute, since I can't talk for long without having a coughing fit. Instead, I talked my kind coworker Marlon into reading the speech from a sheet of paper while I pantomimed next to him, and damn if that didn't work out to be even funnier.

What a great way to spend a birthday.


One Reply to Comedian

Jackie Mason | May 27, 2007
[hidden by author request]


Logical Operator

The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

Eulogy for Two or Possibly Three Restaurants

Dining in Sarasota at 10:30pm on a Friday night is not the easiest proposition. I took my friends Miah and Ines downtown to the only non-franchise I knew would still be open, an upscale sports-themed bar & grill called Patrick's. I've had fifteen or so great meals there, but not last night. Go »

Protecting the Children

"Oh yeah, well you can suck my anus!" "Dude, watch your language! There are kids around." Go »

Stepson

She hasn't come out and told me yet, but it seems pretty clear that my mom is engaged, or at least planning to get married to her boyfriend. I wish them both happiness, especially my mom after eleven solitary years as a widow. This is great news for both of them! Go »

Cheesed

If life is about simple pleasures, does the return of Taco Bell's chili cheese burrito qualify? I don't know if it's nationwide, but they've returned on a wave of marketing around here. It was my favorite menu item a decade ago, until lack of counter space in the kitchen eliminated chili from a supposedly "Mexican" restaurant. Go »

The News is Scary

Sixth-grader admits stabbing ducks with pencil. Does anyone else read this and think, this kid will grow up to be Jeffrey Dahmer? Vegan parents guilty of murder. Go »

Meow Mix

Thanks Evgeni: Cat Music. Go »