"You are very generous, and always think of the other fellow."


Four Replies to In Bed

Steve West | October 25, 2009
When Ellen Degeneres finally came out of the closet and announced, "I'm gay," most people responded sarcastically, "Oh, really." Richard Simmons gained some inspiration from her courage and announced to the world that he was "really, really, really, really gay." Welcome to the club, Scott.

Lori Lancaster | October 26, 2009
[hidden by author request]

Jackie Mason | October 26, 2009
[hidden by author request]

Scott Hardie | October 26, 2009
I'm used to fortune cookies lying to me, like "You will live a long and healthy life by eating lots of Chinese food."


Logical Operator

The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

R.I.P. Mom

You were so still in your bed when I could finally sit down beside you, a few hours after the facility notified me that you had died. I hadn't seen you be that peaceful in years, your eyes not scanning the room for clues, your hands not turning over each object in front of you for endlessly repeated examination. I whispered to you the most urgent and most precious things I had to say, the secrets and atonements and wishes foremost on my mind. Go »

Chatt Story

Kelly and I are home from a brief road trip to Chattanooga. The primary reason for going was the wedding of an old friend of Kelly. The ceremony was beautiful, held on the banks of Fall Creek Falls Lake, with some of the best-written vows I've ever heard, at once personal and profound. Go »

Space Out

As Denise suggested I do, I've gotten partway through the Unsolved Mysteries set on UFOs. (link) It's not my favorite topic, but the show is entertaining no matter what it covers, and they put on a good show. The problem is that most of it is so hard to believe. Go »

Kissingerian

Another of Fareed Zakaria's perfectly lucid articles today, suggesting the only way out of Iraq: (link) Go »

Rolling Revisionism

In all of the coverage of the execution of Danny Rolling, I keep reading that he was "Florida's most notorious serial killer since Ted Bundy." (link) Umm... Doesn't anybody remember Aileen Wuornos? Go »

Det är inte så farligt

Yesterday, Kelly and I joined friends who had free passes to shop at the new Ikea store in Tampa before it opens to the public. It was our my first time in one of those stores, and it was every bit the harrowing shopping marathon I'd heard it was. For a store that boasts so frequently about how efficient everything is, having you proceed through the store in one long winding line for four hours sure doesn't feel that way, but every store has ways of getting you to buy more than you came for and Ikea has come up with a unique one. Go »