My kingdom for an alarm clock that beeps once, gently, 60 seconds before it really begins going off. That way you're woken up comfortably and given a chance to turn it off, instead of being startled awake by loud shrieking and having to scramble for it.


Fourteen Replies to The Time Has Come

Denise Sawicki | June 19, 2007
I despise alarm clocks. I actually never use them because I always wake up on time by myself. It's especially easy to do so in the summer in ND because the sun is up by 5 AM. :-P But your suggestion sounds like a good invention to make alarm clocks less obnoxious.

Anna Gregoline | June 19, 2007
I have never, ever, had an alarm clock I liked. I'm currently using a CD player alarm clock that doesn't play CDs any more, nor any of the "soothing nature sounds" it claims to. It's snooze button is too small, as well and I accidentily turn it off far more than I want to.

Why is it so hard to find a good alarm clock!?!?

Erik Bates | June 19, 2007
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Scott Hardie | June 19, 2007
What's the brand and/or model, Erik? I'd love to get my hands on one of those.

Back when I wore a watch, I could set it to go off a minute before the clock and that was fine. The only other alarm I have now is on my phone and it's a loud one. Maybe I just need to buy another cheap watch and keep it on my nightstand.

Jackie Mason | June 21, 2007
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Scott Hardie | June 21, 2007
Hear hear.

Erik Bates | June 21, 2007
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Anna Gregoline | June 22, 2007
I agree, Jackie. Also when I phone keeps ringing on television or in a movie I feel jumpy.

Denise Sawicki | June 22, 2007
I get jumpy from alarm clocks on TV, but not as much as my dog gets jumpy from doorbells on TV.

Aaron Shurtleff | June 28, 2007
I get that oogie feeling from the keyboard typing sounds they use in commercials, like the southwest.com commercials! Argh!

Amy Austin | June 29, 2007
Heheheh... my dogs bark at TV doorbells, too, Denise -- it's funny, too, that they don't even have to sound identical to the one in my house... they just know that it means someone is at the door. Same with knocking -- any noise that resembles it can set them off, too.

Personally, I *detest* traffic noises -- like honking horns and sirens and shit like that -- on my fucking car radio... talk about getting artificially worked up! This pisses me off so much that it's my number one reason to hate commercial radio... doesn't it ever occur to anyone that this could be really unsafe on the road??? No, I guess they just figure that using traffic noises while you're driving is going to command your attention. Never mind that the command I hear is "CHANGE THE FUCKING STATION!!!"

Denise Sawicki | June 29, 2007
I get worked up from traffic noises on the radio too.

I think we may have managed to desensitize our dog to TV doorbells. He particularly hates the ones on the show "Curb Your Enthusiasm" so we decided to rewind and replay the "doorbell" part of the DVD multiple times in a row until he stopped trying to get up and run to the door and bark. Since then, he has totally ignored doorbells on some other shows, but I guess the grand test would be to play the CYE again.

Scott Hardie | July 3, 2007
This is an unnecessarily obscene follow-up, but I've read that for a teacher, one method to deal with prepubescent boys who can't help giggling at words like "penis" and "vagina" is to pause your lecture, calmly stare at the kid as you repeat the word over and over again until he is too thoroughly embarrassed ever to find the word funny again, then proceed.

Apparently nobody ever did this to Adam Sandler.

Amy Austin | July 5, 2007
HAHAHA!!! Yeah, I think there's definitely something to be said for desensitization training... they only do it when they haven't heard one for a while, but when it happens more often than that, I usually just get the half-hearted "rff" from C.C., the most vigilant of the three when it comes to sounding any intruder alerts... followed by a half-concerned/half-startled "rf" from one of the other two.


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The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

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