WGW: If It's Good Enough for Dan Marino, It's Good Enough for Me
by Scott Hardie on January 10, 2008
This is more like Weight-Gain Wednesday after a week and a half with Kelly, bouncing around Sarasota restaurants and Disney World. No matter how many thousands of calories I burned walking around that theme park for three days, I'm sure I consumed twice as many, and that was just in fudge from the Main Street Confectionery.
Now that I'm back and I've done some very scientific research – asking a friend whether she hated one – I have chosen NutriSystem over Medifast as the exclusive supplier of my every meal. 1) They don't have shakes. You know, like Slim Fast? Those shakes are unholy. 2) They provide my every meal, instead of leaving me on my own for dinner. Sure, I can fix a sensible dinner. That's how I got into this mess in the first place. 3) Their website doesn't annoy me. Call it professional training. 4) You can choose your own menu from the options available. Goodbye split pea soup, hello chocolate peanut-butter bar. 5) Dan Marino lost 22 lbs, and now he looks like *I* could beat him up.
I fired Dr. Can't and passed on the echocardiograph test that he booked for me. I keep taking painful, expensive tests and he keeps telling me that my heart is fine, so enough already. Let's get to what's actually wrong with me. The only thing I have left to fear is winding up in the hospital any time soon and having to sit through his icy disposition again, more so now that he's fired. Hey, it's more incentive to lose weight.
One Reply to WGW: If It's Good Enough for Dan Marino, It's Good Enough for Me
Logical Operator
The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »
The Money Pit
Nobody's falling off of staircases or dropping bathtubs through the floor, but this month, our house has had a lot of things go wrong at once. It feels like every day brings another visit from a contractor. Here's our list so far: Mold remediation: A patch of black mold in the primary bathroom meant having the shower tiles stripped out and the infected drywall removed. Go »Illinois 2013
Ten highlights of my just-concluded road trip to northern Illinois with Kelly, in chronological order: - Seeing lots of friends and family at our engagement party in St. Charles, our old hometown. I was glad to be able to talk to everyone there, and also glad that I now recognize almost everyone in Kelly's large family on sight. Go »You Won't See This in the Goo Game
Jeopardy! history was made yesterday: (link) Go »More Than Meets the Eye
Paramount is holding a contest in which one lucky fan will have their line of dialogue added to the upcoming Transformers movie, spoken in character by Optimus Prime. (link) I wonder if they'll take my submission: "I want these motherfucking Decepticons off this motherfucking plane!" Go »No R'lyeh, I'm Not a Fan
I never thought of myself as a fan of H.P. Lovecraft. I don't think I've read more than a couple of his short stories. Go »
Jackie Mason | January 11, 2008
[hidden by author request]