"Heel, Heinrich!", commands the Governator.
"Kiss my grossly over-developed ass," snarls Heinrich in return.
Anyone ever heard of myostatin before? Not me. Good thing I have some - I can't afford tailored clothing.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Get 'Em While They're Hot

Good stuff. Video of the week 1: Cactus gameshow. We have the technology. Go »

Is This Your Dog?

Recent conversation with Brenda: Me: I just got a text from a Facebook friend that was funny and cruel at the same time. Brenda: Do I want to hear this? Me: He saw a "Missing Dog" poster, called the number and only barked. Go »

Death, Taxes, and You're Wrong

Recent conversation with Brenda: Brenda: Does the sunset look strange to you? It looks like the sun is in front of the poles we're passing. What would cause that? Go »

Double Talk with a Forked Tongue

I've decided that from now on, I'm going to answer every question like a presidential candidate. Friend (voter): "Steve, what are you gonna do this weekend?" Me (blahblahblah): "That's a great question and an important one. Go »

Killer Home Decor (Literally)

From chalk outline welcome doormats to dead horse head pillows à la The Godfather (with protruding tongue, no less), this website features decorations to give your home that perfect serial killer feel. I especially like the pooling blood carpet. Go »

Such As It Is...

Best stuff I found this week. Christmas stuff you either can't afford or shouldn't buy anyway. Spectacular pieces of sculpture made from the incredible, edible egg. Go »