Yesterday, Kelly and I joined friends who had free passes to shop at the new Ikea store in Tampa before it opens to the public. It was our my first time in one of those stores, and it was every bit the harrowing shopping marathon I'd heard it was. For a store that boasts so frequently about how efficient everything is, having you proceed through the store in one long winding line for four hours sure doesn't feel that way, but every store has ways of getting you to buy more than you came for and Ikea has come up with a unique one.

Our friends bought quite a bit, but Kelly and I didn't spend money other than lunch in the cafeteria. I want to say that I'm proud of our self-restraint in holding back, but the real reason is that virtually nothing in that store appealed to us. I have friends with this design sense and there's nothing wrong with it, but personally, we were turned off by the tacky patterns and single bolds colors, and the flat boxy shapes, and modular look to everything. Kelly objects to the modernity and the feeling that everything in the store will be out of style in ten years; me, I just don't care for the look of it at all. I want to get into interior decorating and spruce up my home, and if I liked Ikea's style then I'd be all over their cheap prices and mix & match philosophy; I'd be in heaven in that store. I think that explains it for the people who do like it. Until we get some more money, it's back to Target for us.


Three Replies to Det är inte så farligt

Jackie Mason | May 4, 2009
[hidden by author request]

Kelly Lee | May 7, 2009
"Our first time"? I've been to them before. It's hot gay man watchin time!

Scott Hardie | May 7, 2009
That store has got to be difficult for employees to get across too, even if they know all the shortcuts. If you work on the first floor and the far opposite corner from the cafeteria and you get a fifteen minute break, how many minutes will you really have to relax?


Logical Operator

The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

Ten Best of 2006

The feature is done. It was frustrating not being able to see more movies this year, and the brevity of the feature reflects that. Comments about the list, or mentions of your own favorite films last year, are welcome in the replies to this post. Go »

Head & Shoulders, Knees & Toes

You can look at this as a parody if you wish (I'm no fan of U2), but mostly it's just silly: (link) Go »

Bubba Franks! Bubba Franks, Y'all

There has to be a corny sexual position that nobody actually does (like Dirty Sanchez) named after that man. The rest of my trip is over and was richly enjoyed. We skipped Fearless in favor of playing Playstation games and scarfing down Chinese food while talking at length about the goo game and how it could be better. Go »

Unexpected Easter

This has been an unusual few days. Kelly's father had a stroke on Thursday, so we left town suddenly to see him, ultimately choosing to drive since we can't afford plane tickets on no notice. He's going to be fine; his vision was affected at first but he seems recovered now, pending another examination. Go »

That's All I Have to Say About That

Remember those somber anti-piracy messages before theatrical movies a couple of years ago? Like the near-weepy set painter whose wife and kids were going to live in the poorhouse if you illegally downloaded The Big Chill? They must have had an effect on me, because instead of sadness or sympathy, they were all I could think about when I read that the make-up artist for Forrest Gump killed herself and her husband. Go »

Ketchup Packets

I was verbally mugged by a former coworker today, a guy I used to think of as a friend some time ago. I had the displeasure of laying him off last year, and after months of struggling to get by with nothing but condiments in his fridge, he started a blog to vent his frustration at me and a few other coworkers he disliked. The comments are very mean-spirited, from professional criticisms about my managerial competence and decision-making, to personal and apparently very nasty jokes about my weight and appearance. Go »