I Can Deflect Staples
by Scott Hardie on August 16, 2006

Should you call your day a complete wash if your greatest creative achievement was paper fastener nunchucks?
Six Replies to I Can Deflect Staples
Lori Lancaster | August 16, 2006
[hidden by author request]
Amy Austin | August 17, 2006
...cover it up with some kind of material...

Kris Weberg | August 19, 2006
Hell, Scott, most days I don't even reach the paper-fastener nunchuk level of achievement.
E. M. | August 28, 2006
[hidden by author request]
Logical Operator
The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

My Dinner with Amy
Nice to meet you, old friend. Go »
R.I.P. Mom
You were so still in your bed when I could finally sit down beside you, a few hours after the facility notified me that you had died. I hadn't seen you be that peaceful in years, your eyes not scanning the room for clues, your hands not turning over each object in front of you for endlessly repeated examination. I whispered to you the most urgent and most precious things I had to say, the secrets and atonements and wishes foremost on my mind. Go »
Sinners and Losers
Last week, Katherine Harris publicly denounced the first amendment, calling it "a lie" and said that we were supposed to be a nation of religious law. She also said that not to vote for a Christian is to vote for sin. (link) Apparently in Florida that gets you elected: Yesterday she enjoyed a landslide 50% victory over her competitors in the Senate Republican primary despite a bumbling campaign. Go »
WLW: The First 30
Since we're still putting off NutriSystem until our bank accounts recover from the move, Kelly and I have been focusing on exercise instead. So far it's mostly a lap around the apartment complex a few nights a week, saying hi to underdressed strangers walking their dogs. Last weekend we tried the mall. Go »
Pigeon Panic
Since Adrianne doesn't permit replies to her posts, I'll link it here: Poisoned pigeons fall from sky in Texarkana. The chain of events is too bizarre not to reiterate: A pigeon flew into a bank and defecated on a customer, so the bank put poisoned grain on the roof hoping to drive away the pigeons. Instead, dozens of birds flopped dead on the ground downtown – right during the city's annual festival. Go »

Scott Hardie | August 16, 2006
I just found a use for them: Cat toy. She's been eager to play with anything and everything since her favorite toy, a colored strip of cloth on a stick, was destroyed a few weeks ago. One second I was flinging the toy at her and flinging it back over my shoulder, and the next it was yanked out of my hands and shredded pieces of it flew all over the room. Those ceiling fans are dangerous.