I Can Deflect Staples
by Scott Hardie on August 16, 2006

Should you call your day a complete wash if your greatest creative achievement was paper fastener nunchucks?
Six Replies to I Can Deflect Staples
Lori Lancaster | August 16, 2006
[hidden by author request]
Amy Austin | August 17, 2006
...cover it up with some kind of material...

Kris Weberg | August 19, 2006
Hell, Scott, most days I don't even reach the paper-fastener nunchuk level of achievement.
E. M. | August 28, 2006
[hidden by author request]
Logical Operator
The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

Trial of the Century
I served on my first jury last week, for the gripping case of the Walmart Protein Bar Bandit, accused of a $1.46 theft. Voir dire was oddly focused on whether grazing (eating groceries before you pay for them) was acceptable, whether eating protein right after a workout is important, and whether any of us had strong feelings about the Walmart corporation. Go »
Screw Delta (Gotta Rant)
When I flew to Fargo a while back for Denise's wedding, I woke up at 2am to be out the door by 3am to get to Tampa by 4am to check in by 5am for a 6am flight. I stepped into the long Delta check-in line an hour and fifteen minutes before my flight, but I was concerned at the signs all over the place saying I would be turned away if I arrived less than an hour before the flight. Sure enough, it took me half an hour to get through the line, and the rude Delta clerk refused to let me on the plane even though I could easily make it to the gate in time. Go »
His Name is Bond
[Spoilers for Casino Royale.] One of my favorite bits of any fan-invented mythology is the identity of 007: It is held by some series fans (and me) that "James Bond" is merely a codename. When one Bond is killed or retires, another one takes his place and assumes the same name, which is why you see a different actor every decade and the man doesn't age despite having been around since the Kennedy administration. Go »
This is Me Getting On With My Life
Any advice for a newly single guy? After five months, Denise and I are no longer seeing each other. I won't get into the causes out of respect for her point of view; let's just say she and I each wanted the other to behave differently and it wasn't going to happen. Go »
Going Green
This thing might turn out to be as short-lived as my other two attempts at a personal blog, but damn it if I haven't craved having such an outlet for the better part of a year now. It seems like a week doesn't go by that I don't have some little adventure to turn into an anecdote or a frustration to rant about. My idle thoughts are as pointless as anybody else's, I realize, but that's what the Internet is for (besides porn). Go »











Scott Hardie | August 16, 2006
I just found a use for them: Cat toy. She's been eager to play with anything and everything since her favorite toy, a colored strip of cloth on a stick, was destroyed a few weeks ago. One second I was flinging the toy at her and flinging it back over my shoulder, and the next it was yanked out of my hands and shredded pieces of it flew all over the room. Those ceiling fans are dangerous.