Is it a reflection of our road-rage culture that a company named Dodge manufactures cars with violent names like Ram, Magnum, Caliber, and Viper? I pondered this at the dealership yesterday during the eternal wait between brief flurries of document-signing so I could buy my first car. It took some doing to get the sunroof and other features I wanted, but I'm now the happy (and relieved) owner of a 2007 Dodge Caliber SXT.



On the down side, I'm a weak negotiator and got taken to the cleaners on the price, then again on the financing, which had a lot to do with having no credit history whatsoever. On the upside, I love the Caliber already. It's attractive, it gets a debatable 30mpg, I like the features (there's a friggin' refrigerator in the glove box), I'm proud to buy American, and most importantly, it's brand-spankin' new with a six-year bumper-to-bumper warranty, so all of my maintenance problems with the last car are a thing of the past.

The last car was a 1996 Mercury Cougar XR7, Bostonian edition, bought brand-new by my father six months before his death; I inherited it with a thousand miles on the odometer. Anyone who's hung out with me in the last ten years has ridden in it at some point, and it earned nicknames ("the Mighty Mighty Boss-tonian", "the Time-Warp Car", "the Old Person Car") that I'll remember fondly. But it was one maintenance headache after another, with a check-engine light that stayed on for seven years for various reasons and certain features that never worked from day one. I don't like stepping down from a luxury car to a budget model, but I'll enjoy the newness and good working condition of the Caliber while they last.


Four Replies to Scott's Car is Dead; Long Live Scott's Car

Anna Gregoline | September 5, 2006
Ah yes, I remember your "old person car!"

Congrats, it's always thrilling to get a new vehicle!

Jackie Mason | September 6, 2006
[hidden by author request]

Scott Hardie | September 7, 2006
Thank you both for saying so. I'm still quite pleased with it.

Jackie Mason | September 16, 2006
[hidden by author request]


Logical Operator

The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

His Name is Bond

[Spoilers for Casino Royale.] One of my favorite bits of any fan-invented mythology is the identity of 007: It is held by some series fans (and me) that "James Bond" is merely a codename. When one Bond is killed or retires, another one takes his place and assumes the same name, which is why you see a different actor every decade and the man doesn't age despite having been around since the Kennedy administration. Go »

Jeffrey Katzenberg is a Crazy Person

I'm no fan of 3-D. I have lazy eye, which makes my right eye blurry and my left eye sharp. During a normal movie, I usually sit up front to be absorbed in the picture so that it doesn't matter, or if I sit in the back, I can concentrate to correct my vision. Go »

Ten Things I Learned While Kelly's Parents Pat & Russ Spent a Week Visiting Us

• Florida reminds me of Dave Barry's quip that vacationing in Britain is great because you meet people from entirely different states. We stopped a woman to take our picture; she was visiting from New Jersey and her daughter beside her was from California. The only local we met warned us what bridge not to jump off for swimming because the water is shark-infested. Go »

Lars and the Ripoff

I'm sure that Lars and the Real Girl is a good movie and that Ryan Gosling is Oscar-worthy, yadda yadda. But will the bloggers out there spreading the word please stop acting like it's such an original premise to have an adult treat a life-size doll like a real person? In the past few years alone, I've watched indie movies May and Love Object cover the same ground, with Dummy skirting closeby, and those are only a few examples; plenty more exist through the years. Go »

Mayhem

Last night I saw Killswitch Engage, Slayer, and Marilyn Manson. This morning I discovered that Walgreens sells a pretty good neck brace for $11.99. Aaron Shurtleff bought my Mayhem Festival ticket in May as a gift, and I'm grateful to have another generous friend. Go »

Hello Stupid

I don't know why car companies insist on calling their products "vehicles" now. Apparently "cars" became a dirty word and I missed it. But if you're going to change the term, consider your marketing messages carefully: As a matter of fact, yes, I have heard about radar, sonar, and infared technology in vehicles, such as submarines, aircraft carriers, and helicopters. Go »