Scott's right, it would be hard to get tuna into them. But why oh why oh why oh why must they design those bottles to be so evil? You squeeze and squeeze them, and they only make farting sounds. But you keep trying, and then, with no warning whatsoever, the condiment comes shooting out like a white, purple, red or yellow laser beam, effectively ending the career of a perfectly good shirt, creating a foodstuff mural on the ceiling, and coating the bread until it practically liquifies right there on the cutting board. Adrianne always finds something to hate about everything. If ever I arrive in true paradise, I will be content for about two hours, then I'll be on the phone with my friends back home, telling them about how you can't find a decent pizza to save your life.


One Reply to Why Squeezeable Bottles Suck....

Scott Hardie | October 6, 2006
Everybody has their own solution for getting ketchup out of the glass bottle in the restaurant – tap on the 57! shake the bottle! work it out with a knife! – and of course their own solution only works for them. It's kind of like hiccups in that way. Thus, I say this knowing that it might only work for me, but I get the most out of my squeezeable bottles by tapping them lid-down on the counter a few times before I flip them open and squeeze. It drops all of the insides to the other end of the bottle where I want them. Oh how I wish the 15-year-olds at the local Subway would learn to do that with the mayonnaise bottle so that they don't give up after a few futile squeezes produce little more for my sandwich than the familiar farting sound.


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