Aaron Shurtleff Hates America

Steve Dunn | October 22, 2009
Aaron Shurtleff, you festering puddle of rot. You glistening globule of phlegm. You ass-laden foul-smelling toad-licking fetid sandal scrape.

By which I mean to say, I have a bone to pick with you, sir.

How, exactly, did you decide to forfeit FOUR Stairway To Heaven concerts today, including one to Russ Wilhelm, but then get your act together enough to take your turn in TWO concerts in which you are beating ME??

WHEN YOU KNOW I AM SPRINTING TO THE COVETED THIRD PLACE FINISH!!!!

There I was, chilling at 55, knowing I was cruising to the end right there with Steve West and Scott Hardie, you know, the three of us, the ones who had made it to 55. The Top Three. And then BANG. BOOM. Here comes Aaron Shurtleff for his once-a-week-maybe-I'll-make-moves-in-my-75-pending-concerts oh and by the way I am soundly beating Steve Dunn in two of them... so... I'll forfeit a few here and there, I'll forfeit one to RUSS WILHELM(!) but for damn sure I'm going to take my turns in those Steve Dunn concerts.

Oh, it's on now, Aaron Shurtleff. Like Donkey Kong. Like Donkey Kong JUNIOR. Like Mario's Krash Karts, Aaron Shurtleff! That's how much it is on.

Aaron Shurtleff | October 22, 2009
I don't think anyone but you is coveting that third place finish, sir, but whatever.

I did not intend to forfeit any matches, but those gave out early this morning and I missed them. Oops.

Is it on? Well, you know where to find me this weekend, so bring it! :)

Ryan Dunn | October 22, 2009
Thanks for the laugh.

Go Aaron! If you sweep Steve it locks me in for 4th place!

Lori Lancaster | October 22, 2009
[hidden by request]

Aaron Shurtleff | October 23, 2009
It'll be on like Mario Party 4 st Goo Con: Citrus Ridge! Come on down!! :)

Steve Dunn | October 23, 2009
I would love to be there, if only to smite you in person, but it ain't happening.

Ryan Dunn | October 23, 2009
I'd consider it if there was going to be Mario Kart 64. I'll smoke all you fools in Mario Kart 64.

Aaron Shurtleff | October 25, 2009
Ha! I still know where some of the shortcuts are on Mario Kart 64, so that might be a very interesting contest, indeed! :)

Steve Dunn | October 26, 2009
Dear Lord. Aaron Shurlteff vs. Ryan Dunn in a competition. It's like Osama Bin Laden vs. Saddam Hussein. Is it possible both could lose?

Aaron Shurtleff | October 26, 2009
Dyslexia? :P