Last-Minute Holiday Shopping

Jackie Mason | December 23, 2002
[hidden by request]

Scott Hardie | December 24, 2002
Oh, Christ, I hear you. I spent all day at the mall, but not by choice - I was having my car serviced. I thought it would take two hours and $200, instead it took ten hours and $900. Fortunately I'd had the foresight to get it serviced right next to the mall, so I could finish my shopping. The place was quite empty at 9am, but by noon, the place was throbbing with people. Strangers were asking to share my table in the food court. This mob was somehow even worse in the evening, or maybe it was just my perception because I was so tired.

And all the goddamn kiosk workers were on overdrive with their sales pitches to passers-by, trying to clear their stock. If you're aware of the mini-RC car fad going on right now, you can imagine how overstocked this tiny kiosk was with the damn things, and how desperately the clerk was trying to get me to buy one. I did actually buy one, since I've been trying to purchase just such a little toy for my cats since June, but the clerk gasped when I finally insisted that I was only buying one, despite his pleas.

Scott Hardie | December 24, 2002
Oh yeah, and my "check engine" light is finally off after three continuous years of being on. (It was broken.)

Matthew Preston | December 24, 2002
My "check engine" light has been on for only 6 months. I gotta see if I can beat your record.

Scott Hardie | December 24, 2002
It just came back on again. Does a less-than-24-hour period of it being off count?

Matthew Preston | December 25, 2002
Sure, as long as I get a less-than-24-hour grace period.