In Bed
by Scott Hardie on October 25, 2009

"You are very generous, and always think of the other fellow."
Four Replies to In Bed
Lori Lancaster | October 26, 2009
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Jackie Mason | October 26, 2009
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Scott Hardie | October 26, 2009
I'm used to fortune cookies lying to me, like "You will live a long and healthy life by eating lots of Chinese food."
Logical Operator
The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

Modern Music
Sadness is not when one of your favorite bands (Smashing Pumpkins) puts out their final album in MP3 format only and you miss it because you don't want to get into file-sharing. Sadness is five years later, when you happily stumble across a website with the entire thing available for download and you finally learn how heinous and unpublishable the album was all along. Go »
New Baby Upstairs
WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH WAAAH... Go »
A Friend Received This Fortune in His Fortune Cookie
"Wow! A secret message from your teeth." Go »
I Have Boring Dreams
Real men don't play tennis, and they don't play chess. They play tennis on a giant virtual chessboard where every step of their feet and bounce of the ball instructs the computer where to move the next piece. And they call it chennis. Go »
Milwaukee's Best
Today I learned a valuable lesson: Don't quote that line from Wayne's World about "mill-you-wock-AY" to a native of that city. It's like asking them to bring you a cheese wheel when they visit: You deserve a kick in the balls for it. I learned this while planning my visit to the city this weekend for beer, brats, Packers, and oh yeah, Matthew Preston. Go »
Steve West | October 25, 2009
When Ellen Degeneres finally came out of the closet and announced, "I'm gay," most people responded sarcastically, "Oh, really." Richard Simmons gained some inspiration from her courage and announced to the world that he was "really, really, really, really gay." Welcome to the club, Scott.