The News is Scary
by Scott Hardie on May 4, 2007

Sixth-grader admits stabbing ducks with pencil. Does anyone else read this and think, this kid will grow up to be Jeffrey Dahmer?
Vegan parents guilty of murder. It's a sad incident, but a mistake's a mistake. With two automatic life sentences, shouldn't they have gone for negligent homicide or manslaughter?
Students attend school's first integrated prom. Is there a quote in this story that gives the impression the community has fully faced and dealt with the racism in their community? Changing the school's custom doesn't make the past go away.
It's a wrap. You're hired! Video resumes are the depressing new fad. So people can't even be bothered to read resumes any more? What's next, picking up an item of food at the grocery store wondering if it's nutritious, and having a pre-recorded person on a monitor read off to you the calories and other statistics?
Two Replies to The News is Scary
Anna Gregoline | May 8, 2007
Those vegan parents? How can you watch your kid get thinner and sicker and sicker and not try and make them better? The article says the baby got down the 3lbs 8ozs!
Logical Operator
The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

World Trade, Like, Something
I love it when two teenagers ring up and bag my groceries. "Did you ever see that Nicolas Cage movie about 9/11? I watched that last night, and, like, it got me thinking about how bad that was." Go »
Good Company and Busy Nights
Highlights from my last two weeks, in no particular order: - Miah Poisson, his fiancĂ©e Ines, and her friend Denise have always wanted to see The X Files, and it just so happens I have the complete series on DVD. We've started getting together every Monday night to watch a couple of episodes and eat sandwiches. I'm taking the opportunity to do something I wanted to do the first time I watched the series, which is keep a kill-count. Go »
More Than Meets the Eye
Paramount is holding a contest in which one lucky fan will have their line of dialogue added to the upcoming Transformers movie, spoken in character by Optimus Prime. (link) I wonder if they'll take my submission: "I want these motherfucking Decepticons off this motherfucking plane!" Go »
Long Live Scott's Other New Car
I never thought I'd write these words, but I'm the delighted new owner of a Hummer H2. It's all black, brand new in perfect condition. I've already got it tricked out with glowing ground-effects lights on the undercarriage and special extra-thick tires for off-roading. Go »
Intruder Alert
At 5:30am I was awakened by the doorbell and the sound of someone fumbling with my door. Through the peephole, I watched a young man desperately trying to pick the deadbolt. After a couple of minutes, he gave up and stumbled off towards the other apartments. Go »
Jackie Mason | May 5, 2007
[hidden by author request]