I got a thing for cool looking toilets. What can I say? I'd like most of these to be in Barbie's Dream House except for that face-to-face absurdity. Who thought that was a good idea? And I am not using that hand lotion!!! That last shot I swore I saw the last time I was at Robert Mapplethorpe's house.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

The Real Colon Blow Cereal

Holy metaphors, Batman! This recent All-Bran commercial from Kellogg's touts its ability to aid one in shitting enough bricks to build a barbecue. Go »

Unlike Burger King, Special Orders Upset Us

Recent conversation with Brenda. Brenda: Feel like Subway for lunch? me: Only if I get a foot-long sandwich that's actually 12 inches long. Go »

All Aboard The Idiot Train

I swear that lately, I feel like the proverbial snowball that inexorably turns into an avalanche. Yesterday, I was unloading the van of the last of the grass needed to complete the front yard landscaping. Only 170 square feet so it wouldn't take long. Go »

Oprah Is Immortal

I was talking to Brenda about weight recently - about how hers is creeping up and mine is creeping down. I ran across this article afterwards and showed it to her as a peace offering (man that skillet to the skull really hurts!) Thigh size has been connected to a predilection for heart disease. Go »

Post-vacation Blues

Without going into great detail, my co-workers are muddle-brained knuckleheads that make the Keystone Kops look like a Mensa meeting. Federal sanctions are not that far-fetched. Changes will be made soon. Go »

Exercise By Proxy

Recent conversation with Brenda: Brenda: I just watched a guy do 50 push-ups. Can you do that? Me: Sure. Go »