Chinese Imports Banned

Scott Hardie | October 4, 2003
"Taste of China" is banned from my house.

See, I like to get some take-out and watch Survivor on Thursday nights. It's a ritual that no one is permitted to fuck with. This past Thursday, I found a menu to this Chinese place nearby. They had great prices, so I called at 7:35 and ordered a couple of entrees, figuring I could put one away in the fridge for later; screw this learning-to-cook shit.

Anyway, I sat down and waited. The show started at 8, and I tried in vain to enjoy it. Every flash of headlights in the window, every rumbling outside that sounded like an engine, I got to thinking my food was here, and I wasn't able to concentrate on the show and have a good time.

Come 8:40, my food still wasn't here, so I called them up. I couldn't understand the lady's excuse through her accent, but she said it would be there in another 10-15 minutes. The show ended at 9, and I tore up the menu into pieces, declaring that I would not order from this restaurant again. Nobody fucks with the ritual.

At 9:40, the guy finally arrived at my door. He was apologetic, saying they got hit with some $100 order. Why that should delay my food two hours is beyond me; I've worked in food service and I know that such delays are minor, a few minutes at most. The thing is, the food was still hot, which meant they had just made it before he brought it over.

Anyway, I had taped the show, and despite the mediocre food and knowing the ending, I managed to enjoy it when I watched it the second time. Praise be to Survivor for being such an enjoyable show no matter the circumstances.

Anna Gregoline | October 4, 2003
Dude, that's wrong. Taste of Bitter Disappointment.

Erik Bates | October 5, 2003
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