Ta-Da, It's an Announcement
Mike Eberhart | February 9, 2005
Congratulations........
Anna Gregoline | February 9, 2005
Thanks, man!
I'm not fishing for congrats or anything either - I just don't like it when I find out stuff late - I imagine Kris Weberg might be upset (I certainly hope not) if he finds out here, but I don't have a number for him and he hasn't been online to chat with for a few days.
Amy Austin | February 9, 2005
Well, good for you, Anna.
I was thinking about you yesterday and started to say so, since you hadn't been around and I wondered if you would be... I cannot deny having mixed feelings about that, but I did want to pay you a sincere compliment: for all your flaws, you really *are* the best conversation starter here, and things really aren't the same without you around (for better *or* for worse!). I really hope you'll take that totally as it's intended, because what I'm saying is... that I'm glad to have you back. Peace, and congratulations!
Anna Gregoline | February 9, 2005
Thanks Amy, I appreciate that.
Dave Stoppenhagen | February 9, 2005
Congrats.
Nadine Russell | February 9, 2005
Congratulations Anna!
Jackie Mason | February 9, 2005
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Anna Gregoline | February 9, 2005
We're set on October, but other than that, there is nothing at all decided. In some ways I am dreading the whole process, because my mom loves stuff like this and goes into FULL PLANNING MODE and it's hard to shoot down her ideas when she's so enthusiastic. Luckily, my sister had a very low-key and simple wedding like want (albeit over 10 years ago) so she kind of paved the way.
Erik Bates | February 9, 2005
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Anna Gregoline | February 9, 2005
Yeah, time to finally stop "living in sin!"
Amy Austin | February 9, 2005
"Shacking up" as Dr. Laura likes to put it... I can't stand her.
Scott Horowitz | February 10, 2005
Congrats Anna, when can I expect my invitation? And I need to know where to send my traditional engagement gift "toaster" to? :) JK
Jackie Mason | February 10, 2005
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Anna Gregoline | February 10, 2005
Love the new photo, Jackie! Sexy Mama!
Yeah, we decided on October and I've already seen like three things saying that October is very popular - what gives? I'll be pissed if I have difficulty finding stuff in what is normally an "off month." I hate the wedding industry.
I've been to The Knot once or twice, but not lately, I should go check it out again. I do frequent "indiebride.com" though.
Jackie Mason | February 10, 2005
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Amy Austin | February 10, 2005
What photo are y'all talking about??? I'm seeing the same picture of Jackie that's been there since "Photo Call"!
Jackie Mason | February 10, 2005
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Anna Gregoline | February 10, 2005
Weird, I didn't even notice the hat until you pointed it out.
October was picked because we met in October and both love fall. Plus, since we'll be getting married here but his family is in Massachusetts (and probably can't all make it), we'll honeymoon up there and enjoy the fall foilage. =)
I'm frustrated already though trying to plan details. I can't decide if I want to get married in private and have a party for everyone or get married in front of people or a small combo of both (either have family witness or get married privately and then repeat vows in front of everyone). I like the idea of private sometimes - no performance anxiety, after all, but I want my family to see it and my friends, so I'm very very conflicted. =(
Amy Austin | February 10, 2005
Yep, still the same old pic here... that's why I'm confused -- how come Anna can see the new one, and I can't??? I've been logged off since last time, too!
Anna, I really wouldn't know what to tell you... I tend to have about the same amount of performance anxiety as the next person (or perhaps less -- I do usually handle public speaking pretty well), but when we exchanged our vows -- in front of just the chapel rep, Rev. Cotton, and Eddie Powers as Elvis -- I was TERRIFIED! You can see in our pictures that I was turning E's hand white with my death grip... he was surprised and thought that he'd be the scared one. ;DDD I guess it's just one of those things that you never know how you'll be until you're in those shoes, you know?
If you think you might be like me in that situ, then perhaps you might want to consider a small/private ceremony with a videographer present? That way, you can let everyone see it on tape later (maybe even at your reception???) and save yourself the possibly inevitable agony. A videotape was part of our package, and I've still never showed it to anyone... but only for lack of thought/opportunity -- maybe on our 5th anniversary... ;D
Anna Gregoline | February 10, 2005
That's not an option for me because I hate being videotaped more than I do being watched - there's something about it that wigs me out for some reason, and I don't like watching back stuff I've done on tape - it's like a completely different interpretation of how I experienced it.
It's not so much that I'll be scared, it's more so that I think I'll start crying (cause I'm a huge crybaby) and when I cry I get choked up fast and it's hard to talk, so I don't want to be up there trying to speak while people are watching!
Amy Austin | February 10, 2005
I understand about the crying thing, too, really... but what if he (the videographer) just hides??? ;DDD
Anna Gregoline | February 10, 2005
I can't justify the money because I would never, ever watch it.
Amy Austin | February 10, 2005
You don't have a skilled friend with access to a camcorder? Ah, never mind -- it was just a suggestion I thought might help. Good luck.
Anna Gregoline | February 10, 2005
I guess I just like pictures better. There's just something creepy about video to me. We were never a video family.
I just thought of something - if we're legally married at the courthouse or whatever, then we could do a ceremony with family that's not technically "real" but it could still be done...that eliminates needing to find a minister, a difficult task for two non-religious people like ourselves.
Denise Sawicki | February 10, 2005
I'm an atheist, the fiance is agnostic, and we got a Unitarian Universalist minister. She claims to be an atheist herself. That could be an option. I don't think the UU people tend to require religious-themed ceremonies.
Anna Gregoline | February 11, 2005
I wish I could just have Scott marry us, but it's not legal in Illinois to do that. =)
Amy Austin | February 11, 2005
You can't be married by a notary public there? You can in Florida...
Anna Gregoline | February 11, 2005
I don't think so - I found this somewhere and I think it's right -
The law in Illinois states that to be legally married, the ceremony must be performed by a judge, an ordained minister of a church, or rabbi of a synagogue. According to officials at the Cook County Clerk's Marriage Unit, you cannot simply have a friend get ordained on the Internet like Joey on Friends -- they must be officially recognized by an actual congregation. Other counties' requirements may be more lenient first. Call to find out.
Anna Gregoline | February 11, 2005
I dug some more and found this:
Florida is one of only three states (the other two are South Carolina and Maine) who authorize their notaries public to "solemnize the rites of matrimony."
I guess we're not in the lucky states. I would have my friend Jennifer do it.
Jackie Mason | February 11, 2005
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Anna Gregoline | February 11, 2005
I don't even know anything, yet, seriously! LOL.
I do know whatever the ceremony ends up being, that the reception is going to be champagne and cocktail fare, very elegant. I want a simple white long cocktail type dress....that's all I know right now!
Denise Sawicki | February 11, 2005
She said she is a "lay minister" or maybe "lay" something else, I kind of forgot. :P But she has done a bunch of weddings before so I suppose it must be legal. I was kind of surprised that she is an atheist, too. They hold atheist meetings in the basement of their church, and I found nothing that really offends my atheist sensibilities on their web page at (link) . Needless to say, this is a religion that REALLY religious people would probably scoff at :).
I have a red and black dress and this is supposed to take place at my apartment. It is not exactly going to resemble a real wedding. No wedding party. For one thing, I don't know any girls who would ever agree to be bridesmaids :). I'll probably make a little web page for it after the fact, with pictures. I don't have a professional photographer but hey, that way if I look bad I can blame it on the photographer's unprofessionalism :). I think the dress was meant to be a prom dress or some such thing, it is probably totally inappropriate, but I think it is so cool. I never had a fancy dress before.
Anna Gregoline | February 11, 2005
I'm sure it's beautiful and totally appropriate! The only people you need to please are yourself and your beau, so no worries! Definitely point us towards pictures after the big day if you don't mind us peeking!
Jackie Mason | February 11, 2005
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Denise Sawicki | February 11, 2005
Hey, thanks for your interest and kind words, everybody :). I normally try not to be the center of attention in any way, but I have to admit it feels good every so often. I doubt it will be TV-worthy though! I'm just hoping not to bore the guests to tears. The total number of guests will be ten or less. I will sure post some pictures...
Nadine Russell | February 12, 2005
I was scrapbooking last week and one of the girls was doing her wedding pictures. She wore a red dress and got married at her parents house on the stairway. She looked absolutely beautiful and I'm sure you will too Denise. I like non-traditional weddings. They're a nice change every once in a while.
Jackie Mason | February 12, 2005
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Denise Sawicki | February 12, 2005
Well, as for me, I kind of didn't feel like legally changing my name at the moment. I was worried that it might be a hassle and interfere with my immediate enjoyment of being married :). Seems like there would be dozens of businesses to inform of the change. I'm just weird. But if people want to call me Denise Albert that is cool by me I guess, it's really far more mellifluous than my current name. I don't know, maybe it won't be that annoying, maybe I should just change it right away, any opinions? :P Yeah, that's right, I am asking advice on my name from people I've never met. Heh.
Anna Gregoline | February 12, 2005
I'm really conflicted on the name thing - Jesse's last name is Thomas, so it's not that - it's just that changing your name seems so strange to me - I'm not Anna Thomas, I'm Anna Gregoline! I don't like the idea of changing such a strong part of my identity. So the verdict is still out on that one.
Denise Sawicki | February 12, 2005
Apparently my parents gave me my first name because it was a normal name in French and I have those French-Swiss relatives. If I took Albert for a last name it wouldn't be so mismatched I guess, the last name would also be pronounceable in French. :P Like Anna, though, I've always thought it would be a little weird to adjust to having a different last name. Hmm. I didn't mean to be kind of hijacking your thread for my own uses, Anna, I just couldn't help it I guess! :) Congrats again on your engagement.
edit: I mean, of course, discussion not thread ;)
Jackie Mason | February 12, 2005
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Amy Austin | February 12, 2005
See, I have the opposite thing -- a name that is easier than my husband's... I am in much agreement with Anna & Denise on this one. In fact, my name is still only "Amy Austin" legally... I feel like I may have "discussed" this here before, though? In the military, your last name is even *more* your identity, and I also thought it would pretty weird to hear someone else's name and have to respond like it were mine. That, and I just think it a rather bizarre and outdated patriarchal tradition that only serves to make naming kids easier... and something about that just makes me kind of sick.
But, it was a very important issue to E when we first got married, and I've been thinking on changing it legally (for birthday, Valentine's, or 5th anniversary gift) -- especially now that I'm out of the Navy -- but I'm not sure that it matters much to him anymore (now that he knows what being married... or being married to me, anyway... is really like), because he asked me if I was sure that's what I wanted to do. So... now I'm back to not knowing.
Anna Gregoline | February 13, 2005
I love the hijack, actually! This is fun.
Jackie Mason | February 20, 2005
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Steve Dunn | February 20, 2005
Heh heh, you're going to be Jackie Mason? I love it.
Congratulations to both of you!
Anna Gregoline | February 20, 2005
Wow! We found our place too - (link)
That's for our wedding and reception. Now on to a million other things. I hope I don't go crazy during this.
Jackie Mason | February 20, 2005
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Anna Gregoline | February 21, 2005
It's a beautiful venue, Jackie, I'm sure whatever you do will be awesome. Did they help you with ideas, telling you about previous parties there?
Jackie Mason | February 22, 2005
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Anna Gregoline | February 22, 2005
As far as I can tell, you're not weird, because I'm freaking out and if that's weird than I'M weird too!
Denise Sawicki | February 28, 2005
I am now married and all is well!! Photos will come eventually unless I look terribly scary in them all. :)
Amy Austin | February 28, 2005
Congratulations, Denise... and I doubt you could have looked *that* scary -- after all, he did marry you, didn't he?!!! ;DDD
Erik Bates | February 28, 2005
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Anna Gregoline | February 28, 2005
Congrats!!!!! I hope it all went well. Can't wait to see a picture!
John E Gunter | February 28, 2005
Grats to you Anna. Remember during this time of planning to try and make sure you take the time to do everything you need by not waiting to the last moment. Try and have fun doing it too!
Biggest thing to remember, try and stay calm!
John
Anna Gregoline | February 28, 2005
It's the hardest thing - I'm so nervous about getting things settled. I don't think I can actually focus on the important stuff until after the details are ironed out.
Jackie Mason | March 1, 2005
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Denise Sawicki | March 3, 2005
I got the pictures developed but there is a delay in putting them online since I forgot to bring them the one time I was near a scanner. It's by definition not going to be as fancy looking as these ones that are planned for years or even months. :) What did you want to see, just us, or all the pictures? Scott, any opinions on that question?
Anna Gregoline | March 3, 2005
That's ok - we're not going to have a formal photographer because it's too expensive - and I can't believe how much my parents are already paying for our (small and simple) wedding. In this age of digital cameras, we figure we can take enough pictures ourselves. I was initially disappointed cause I love photos and it will make me nervous to rely on others - but it makes sense.
Jackie Mason | March 4, 2005
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Scott Hardie | March 4, 2005
Personally, I would like to see all of the pictures, Denise. Which ones you share with TC are up to you.
Denise Sawicki | March 5, 2005
OK, here is an illustration of why you may want professional hairstylists, makeup artists, and photographers for your special event, as well as a venue free of such items as 70's carpet and disgusting bunny rabbits! I still like the $45 dress, however! There are more pictures than this which somehow got left out when I assigned Darrell the terribly tedious task of scanning them all. I may make a better web page once I have them all.
(link)
Scott Hardie | March 5, 2005
Great pictures. I think they came out pretty well. Then again I took most of them so I'm inclined to say that. :-) Thanks for sharing these, Denise.
Lori Lancaster | March 5, 2005
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Jackie Mason | March 5, 2005
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Anna Gregoline | March 5, 2005
Aw, your dress is very pretty and you're both cute!
Amy Austin | March 5, 2005
It's a Titanic dress!!! (Remember Rose's dinner/jump dress?!!)
I like it... especially with Darrell's coordinating ensemble -- cool! You do look cute together.
You can totally tell those are your parents, Denise... are D&D twins? Kind of funny that you're now his folks' third "D" -- is Darrin married, too? Need to find him a "Dana" or "Danielle"... (Okay, I'll stop being stupid now...)
I didn't realize that Scott was there, too -- how cool is that?!! And poor Bella... she might be hurt to know that she was just a crasher there! ;D
Amy Austin | March 5, 2005
Oh...
And as far as professional vs. amateur photography, I can give you at least one tip that can improve upon every amateur's photos -- compositionally speaking -- but I don't know how many people you want to try and impress this upon. (If you're relying on multiple friends/family to accumulate your shots, you're going to have a variety of looks anyway -- that's just the thing about photography...)
Every amateur's instinct is to frame a shot so that the subject's head/torso are dead center. The problem with this is that you end up with many shots that have a lot of dead/wasted space over the subject's head, and sometimes the subject is chopped off awkwardly at the knees or ankles (e.g. Eric Brodsky's portrait -- sorry to knock on your photog's skills, Denise... just trying to be helpful! Thankfully, though, your most important ones -- of the two of you -- don't appear to be like this... probably because someone was concentrating on capturing your whole dress.)
So that is the solution... don't just get caught up in getting the subject's face -- bring the camera down just a touch from where your brain's auto-pilot wants you to be, and think about composing your whole subject's body (this includes group shots)... about where the bottom of the picture will be, and who will be losing what limbs! Also pay attention to background... you don't want trees or telephone poles to be growing out of anybody's head... or something that resembles horns!!! (Unless you really hate that person! ;D) Many a potentially good photo is ruined just by failing to use these very simple tips, and it's something that *everyone* does -- you really have to train yourself out of it.
This is the best advice I have to try and make your amateur wedding shots better, guys! (I'm sorry I didn't give it *before* yours, Denise -- but they aren't as bad as you'd have people believe, either!) And just FYI... my own wedding shots were taken by the counter guy at the Las Vegas chapel we got married in... obviously, an amateur. But what really devastated me was that a whole roll was lost to some kind of flash-sync malfunction that my camera developed *that night*!!! (That's my second tip for amateurs, BTW... unless you are using *really* slow shutter speeds and/or really fast films or digital, you will *always* require a flash for indoors. There is very rarely "enough light in here", as people like to believe!!!) So I only have a handful of our special moment. Although I could have done better myself, I was happy enough with them -- can't be the bride *and* the photographer after all! ;DDD
Denise Sawicki | March 6, 2005
Yes they are twins - identical or so they say, although I don't see such a strong resemblence myself! Darrin is not married - do you know any nice girls? Preferably in the US? hehe
Thanks for the kind words, everyone. I cropped out a bunch of extra space on the ones of the two of us (that's a good thing about computers) but the others are as is... Unfortunately, photos of me usually prompt me to say the words "I hate my face" repeatedly but I guess these are OK anyhow! Hehe it is so cool to have women cooing over my wedding pictures, not something I really expected to happen to me in this lifetime...
You may be right that it looks like a Titanic dress... I called it a vampire princess dress, myself. I thought it looked really goth with these high heeled boots I pulled out of the closet to take everyone to a Chinese buffet afterwards. No pictures exist of that - I must have looked a little odd, since everyone outside of our group was in sweatshirts and jeans. Nobody at the restaurant asked me what was up with the dress, however.
Amy Austin | March 6, 2005
Wow... I didn't think they were *identical* -- at least you can tell them apart quite easily! ;D
I'm sorry to say that I don't know many single women, here *or* abroad. Most all of my friends are at least half a decade older than I (which usually means "married" as well!) -- and I had two friends in WA in their 40s. Too bad, since he's pretty cute -- looks to be an easy sell! ;DDD
I'd like to see the dress with the boots... very "Stevie Nicks"! (I hope you don't find that insulting... I *love* her!)
E. M. | March 6, 2005
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Anna Gregoline | March 6, 2005
It's cool that you both changed something in your names. That's my problem with name-changing usually - I get that marriage is a changing thing and that it's neat to take on someone else's name, for the symbolism involved - but I'm not the only one changing, so is my husband. It doesn't seem right or fair that only one name changes. And I didn't change at all as far as an individual goes. I'm still Anna Gregoline, and that's what I want to stay. I have no problem with anyone calling me "Mrs. Thomas" socially though. I guess it's a tradition that does mean a lot to many men but it doesn't make sense to me. I'm glad that Jesse doesn't mind I won't change my name - he only wanted to make sure that our children have his last name, and I agree, I don't like the confusion that can arise from naming kids different last names.
Jackie Mason | March 6, 2005
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E. M. | March 7, 2005
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Anna Gregoline | March 7, 2005
See, now that would be cool!
Personally, I hate the whole business. I know there are serious practical considerations, but I wish it didn't have to be that way. It saddens me that so many women out there lose their maiden name heritage.
Lori Lancaster | March 7, 2005
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Jackie Mason | March 11, 2005
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Anna Gregoline | March 11, 2005
OH, Jackie! Thanks a lot, now I'm in a wedding spiral. =)
Amy Austin | March 11, 2005
'Tis but a sampling, Jackie... ;-)
Anna Gregoline | March 15, 2005
Went to the "tasting" yesterday, so now we have a menu for the reception...I wish I could go to a tasting everyday, it was super fun! I'd always rather sample a menu than eat one thing, I'm very indecisive. I did get kind of tipsy from sampling four kinds of wine though. =)
Jackie Mason | March 29, 2005
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Anna Gregoline | March 29, 2005
I don't think it's too soon - I can't really give advice though, because we're getting married and having the reception in the same venue - a restaurant/banquet place.
Dave Stoppenhagen | March 29, 2005
Jackie, what my wife was told about reserving any place, church or hall, should be done about a year and half in advance. We found this out when we were originally scheduling the place we got married, about 6 months in advance. Luckily there was a cancellation and we were able to set our date.
Anna Gregoline | March 29, 2005
It's ridiculous, isn't it? When is your wedding date?
Jackie Mason | March 30, 2005
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Jackie Mason | June 12, 2005
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Anna Gregoline | June 13, 2005
Did you already go try it on or did you just see it from afar?
I tried on my dress again on Saturday with shoes to see how tall I would be - unfortunately, even with a 3-inch heel, it still needs to be hemmed (it would only work on a 7 foot tall woman, apparantly). Still need to do suit for Jesse, rings for both of us, pick out the cake, send invites to shower and to wedding, register for gifts....
Jackie Mason | June 14, 2005
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Anna Gregoline | February 9, 2005
I'm not the type to proclaim this kind of thing, and this is the kind of post I don't really like making, but since I seem to have cautiously rejoined the forum, I'll feel like I'm hiding it otherwise.
I'm getting married!
Whew, that's out.
Back to your regularly scheduled TC.