We Never Start Working for You

Scott Hardie | July 9, 2002
Just lodging a complaint in my little weblog world where I can pretend that shit like this matters: I'm ticked at Verizon Wireless. Weeks ago, before we even moved into this house (it was June 17th, to be precise), we decided it was time to get cell phones, and since Verizon was already doing our regular phone service, we ordered phones off their web site. We each ordered a phone (they had a buy-one-get-one-free deal) and a separate plan and phone number and all that jazz. They said the phones would arrive in 2 to 5 business days. After two weeks, I checked my email confirmation to see how I could reach them to find out where the phones were, and there was no number; it just said to reply to the email address for service. So I did, asking where the phones were. A week later, I wrote another email asking where the phones were. Still no answer. Kelly's taking a road trip starting Wednesday and really needs her phone. So today I track down their real customer service phone number and try to get help, and have a hell of a time navigating through their automated menu because I don't have a mobile phone number to punch into the system. After a long-ass wait, the lady finally tells me that I don't exist in their system, that they never got my order. Fuckers! Then why do I have a confirmation email from you, with a specific order number on it? I refused her offer to sell me two new phones (at full price) and quickly checked to see if my card had been charged, and fortunately it hadn't. I hope that's the last business I ever have to do with Verizon Wireless.