My father was born and raised in North Carolina. Throughout my childhood we would make the summer trek to my Granny and Grandpaw's house in the middle of the state. Many a summer night passed listening to roosters (they crow all friggin' night), the occasional gator grunt, and my hillbilly cousins fart and scratch while playing cards. Their discussions often centered around things just like this: The need for a better spit can; guns for their kids; the question as to with whom they would rather sleep, their wives or their guns; and electricity - highly overrated. I love my cousins still. Merry Christmas guys! And Tinker (a real cousin), I found the best game for you. Check your mailbox.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Christmas Post #1: Yeah, I Said Christmas

It's way before Thanksgiving, I know. But I'm doing my part to save those last minute shoppers from themselves. Allowing time for the infamous shipping & handling, now is the time to begin the annual spending free-for-all. Go »

Ice Cream That Would Make Homer Simpson Retch

In all honesty, I felt physically ill after about 1/3 of the way through this list. I could actually taste some of this nauseating stuff and it made my stomach churn. I don't even want to know what raw horseflesh flavor is like. Go »

Happy Halloween

Back when I was about ten, I went trick or treating as a witch doctor. I got to a house that I didn't know who lived there and was greeted by a kindly looking old lady. When I routinely and without much enthusiaism stated, "Trick or treat," she responded by handing me a piece of religious literature. Go »

Slip Slidin' Away

Why do adults get on children's slides? Compilation film of various acidents, big, small, young, and old. The fifth clip in of the guy going down the water slide head first sans kid almost gave me a brain hemorrhage from laughing. Go »

Commercial Parodies

I've heard the phrase, "Yeah, that's when Saturday Night Live was funny." It's always been funny to me. Here are 18 clips of their best commercial parodies including Colon Blow cereal, Taco Town, and Homocil. Go »

I'm a Doctor, Not a Kitchen Appliance!

My toaster has a timer on it that let's you know when it's finished. It seems a little silly to add a timer beeping that's a redundant addition to the toast loudly popping up from the machine that means the same thing. So now, because the timer emits a sound eerily similar to an EKG indicating flatline, every time it goes off I'll say to Brenda, "He's bread, Jim." Go »