Recent conversation with Brenda:

me: I'm thinking of buying that 5-hour energy stuff.

Brenda: Think it'll be worth it?

me: Depends on what it costs – that whole dollars to extra push-ups ratio.

Brenda: Well, considering you do no push-ups now it sounds like a sure winner even if it only gets you to try one.

me: I'd like to try and create my own formula. It's like legal cocaine. I'd probably pour it on the kitchen table and snort it.

Brenda: I am not cleaning that up.

me: I'll have enough energy to clean it up, mop the floor, install a new garbage disposal and I'd still have 4:45 left,

Brenda: Seems like there's a lot of competition for sales.

me: They won't stand a chance if I sell mine and call it boob flavored.

Brenda: Boob flavored. As in boobs.

me: It'll fly off the shelves


One Reply to I Am A Marketing Genius

Aaron Shurtleff | March 4, 2012
Put me down for 2 cases, please!


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Thorough Movie Reviews Revisited

Are you one of the group of people, like myself, who insist that they are not influenced by movie critics and make your film choices based on whim, fancy, instinct or some other method completely unrelated to some "professional's" opinion? Perhaps you should visit this website where you can rate (not review) movies yourself, and compare the result with a series of national reviewers to see whose opinion most closely matches yours. Maybe that particular reviewer deserves a second look since you two seem to be on similar movie viewing wavelengths. Go »

Death, Taxes, and You're Wrong

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Greasy Pole (Not Ron Jeremy)

Apparently, there is an annual contest in which men in drag attempt to walk the length of a greasy pole suspended over a body of water. It appears to be about 40 feet in length and about 20 feet over the water. The object being to reach the flag at the end of the pole. Go »

My Favorite Memory

Yesterday, we held the memorial service for my father-in-law. There were approximately 100 people attending and afterward about 1/3 gathered at his home for a small meal and sharing remembrances. I chose to share my memory of the time, twenty years ago, when I asked him for his blessing for my planned proposal to Brenda, his eldest daughter. Go »

Homecoming

Brenda and I went to closing for our new house today. Everything went smoothly and an hour and a half later I left with the keys in my pocket. We're moving this weekend so I'll be a little scarce here. Go »

The Bus Stops Here

In Slapshot, Paul Newman encourages the minor league hockey team he captains to play like goons. The team begins to have some success and the driver of the team bus joins in the spirit of gooniness. Paul Newman approaches him while he is proceeding to smack the exterior of the bus with a sledge hammer and inquires as to what he is doing. Go »

Happy anniversary!

Funeratic began today in 1996.