One of the first impressions I learned as a kid was the Charlie-in-the-box from the Island of Misfit Toys. "Nobody wants a Charlie-in-the-box." Yeah, that really cracked up all the girls in third grade. Rankin/Bass and Rudolph appear to have graduated to R-rated dialogue. The images may be of Hermey and the Chief Elf but the voices are definitely R. Lee Ermey and Matthew Modine. Rudolph done Full Metal Jacket style. I'm really not sure if the third grade girls of today would be more or less impressed with that impression.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

My Child is a Kite

Parenting is like flying a kite. When I was a boy of nine, I went out to fly a kite on the banks of the Potomac River. The Virginia border sat just across the river. Go »

The Texas Chili Cook-Off

Recently, at a Bowie Baysox baseball game, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a Texas chili cook-off. The original person called in sick at the last minute, and I happened to be standing there at the judge’s table, asking for directions to the Coors Light truck, when the call came in. I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans, probably) that the chili wouldn’t be all that spicy; and besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted and became Judge #3. Go »

Lost in Translation

Some ad slogans that had hilarious results when translated into other languages for international marketing. Go »

And A Super Thank You To You

"I can fly!" "I can burn things up just by looking at them!" "I can change the density of my body from the heaviest metal to the most ephmeral gas!" Go »

Redneck ROFL

I've been to this site a few dozen times without considering linking to it. But a picture they posted really cracked me up because it, once again, reminded me of my Carolina cousins, rednecks all. Anyway the picture I'm referring to is called redneck Barbies and they remind me of a favorite pair of cousins of mine, Rodney and Looler. Go »

Exercise By Proxy

Recent conversation with Brenda: Brenda: I just watched a guy do 50 push-ups. Can you do that? Me: Sure. Go »