One of the first impressions I learned as a kid was the Charlie-in-the-box from the Island of Misfit Toys. "Nobody wants a Charlie-in-the-box." Yeah, that really cracked up all the girls in third grade. Rankin/Bass and Rudolph appear to have graduated to R-rated dialogue. The images may be of Hermey and the Chief Elf but the voices are definitely R. Lee Ermey and Matthew Modine. Rudolph done Full Metal Jacket style. I'm really not sure if the third grade girls of today would be more or less impressed with that impression.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

I'll Take Potpourri for $1000, Alex

Mix of the best stuff I found this week. More drunk pwned photos. Do you dress like a douchebag? Go »

And Justice for All

Recent conversation with Brenda: Brenda: Why are you all wet? Me: I knocked a plant off the kitchen counter. Brenda: The plant got you that wet? Go »

Cartoon Nostalgia

Anybody else remember The Mighty Heroes? How about The Wacky Races or Hong Kong Phooey? Alright, how about Super Chicken or Go Go Gophers? Go »

See You At The Pole

At the end of my college career, I walked on the campus of the University of Maryland for the thousandth time. Near the chapel, in front of an administrative building, stood flagpoles bearing the flag of the State of Maryland flying slightly lower than the flag of the United States. Annually, in September, students are encouraged to gather at the flagpole of their school and pray, an event called "See You At The Pole". Go »

Coolest Home Theater Ever

Chance of impressing your friends: 100% Chance of getting laid: Somewhat lower. This is definitely going to be a part of Barbie's Dream House. Especially if it comes with a replicator. Go »

Me and Al Bundy

Recently, Brenda made the mistake of asking me to fix the toilet. It seemed to have gunk in the thingy that supplies the water and would only filll if I poked it with a paper clip in the spout thingy. You can tell I'm a semi-professional because of all the technical jargon. Go »