Yesterday was my 13th anniversary of dating Kelly. We've been through many ups and downs together, and those downs have to do with why we're not married yet, but I love her as much now as I ever have. Here are 13 things that have been a part my life for less time than we've been dating:

- The Internet.

- My cousin Vanessa, who's now in middle school.

- Paying taxes.

- Manhood. (Get your mind out of the gutter!)

- A high school diploma.

- JonBenet Ramsey, Theodore Kaczynski, Dolly the sheep, and other news figures of 1996.

- Having a brother.

- Voting.

- Sony PlayStation.

- Not living under my parents' roof.

- Chinese buffets.

- Every friend I have, except Lori.

- Knowing what love is.


Three Replies to Feeling Lucky

Jackie Mason | March 17, 2009
[hidden by author request]

Lori Lancaster | March 18, 2009
[hidden by author request]

Matthew Preston | March 25, 2009
I really like this list! Certainly puts things in perspective. It definitely is a heartwarming thought that you've been in love with Kelly longer than with Chinese buffets. Is Vanessa the little one we met in Pittsburgh in 2000? (Zippy disk!)


Logical Operator

The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

Mayhem

Last night I saw Killswitch Engage, Slayer, and Marilyn Manson. This morning I discovered that Walgreens sells a pretty good neck brace for $11.99. Aaron Shurtleff bought my Mayhem Festival ticket in May as a gift, and I'm grateful to have another generous friend. Go »

Sup

Miscellaneous goings-on: - Work is a joy. I have become accustomed to operating in ongoing semi-crisis mode because something's going wrong at any given time, and I love it. I love seeing the pressures of schedule and interpersonal conflict force my staff to devise innovative new solutions. Go »

Windbag

I don't know what Polaroids he has of whom, but somehow Tom Skilling has elevated himself to some kind of all-important weather-broadcasting god. When I grew up in Chicago, I watched him gradually get a bigger and bigger budget for his animated graphics, and gradually get a larger and larger timeframe to deliver his dull reports. By the time I left town, he had a whole 20 minutes of the hour-long midday newscast for the fucking weather, and boy did he find trivia to fill it: Average dew points across Cook County on this day in 1854, theta-e temperature predictions for every Cubs home game next season, you name it. Go »

Earth to Cat

What part of get down! are you pretending not to understand? Go »

This Blog Post Definitely Doesn't Conform to NPOV Standards

I once coined a rule that you couldn't read more than three complete articles on Wikipedia without running into a reference to some obscure joke from The Simpsons, Monty Python, or most commonly, Family Guy. Seriously: I just now clicked two links and landed at Anarcho-syndicalism of all things, and sure enough, there's Holy Grail in the "trivia" section. Should it be plural like that, since no one is ever going to enter another item of trivia? Go »

Mile-High Hypocrisy

The homeowners' association in a Denver suburb is furious that one of its residents has dared to put up a Christmas wreath in the shape of the peace symbol. (link) Yeah. Keep reading till the end. Go »