Have a Nice Day!
by Steve West on December 9, 2021
I'd like to get a part-time job now that I'm retired but can't seem to find any long-lasting energy (Damn MS!). Brenda suggested being a Wal-Mart greeter.
"That doesn't take a lot of energy," she remarked.
I responded, "Oh, really? You have no idea."
I live in a fairly urban area but we have a few trailer parks and crackervilles nearby. Given my low tolerance of rudeness, I shared with Brenda how I imagined what would happen after only a few hours on the job.
A very loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman would walk into the store with her two kids, yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.
I'd say pleasantly, "Good morning and welcome to Wal-Mart. Nice children you have there. Are they twins?"
The ugly woman would stop yelling long enough to say, "Hell no, they ain't twins. The oldest one's 9, and the other one's 7. Why the hell would you think they're twins? Are you blind, or stupid?"
I'd reply, "I'm neither blind nor stupid, Ma'am. I just couldn't believe someone slept with you twice. Have a good day and thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart."
My supervisor would, no doubt, say I probably wasn't cut out for this job.
One Reply to Have a Nice Day!
Web Junkie
Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »
Driftwood
Washed up on the shores of my PC. In the spirit of Monty Python & The Holy Grail intro, "Those responsible for sacking the people who have just been sacked have been sacked," comes this notice. Beautiful pictures of a fairly clever notion, holding the sun. Go »Halloween Post #7: Scary Movies
Movie moments are still stuck in my head from films I saw 30 years ago, moments that scared the crap out of me then and still run chills down my spine today. This web page has collected 100 of these scary film moments and tried to supply a Youtube clip for each one (not successful) and some interesting commentary. This site might hold you until Halloween. Go »Happy Halloween
Back when I was about ten, I went trick or treating as a witch doctor. I got to a house that I didn't know who lived there and was greeted by a kindly looking old lady. When I routinely and without much enthusiaism stated, "Trick or treat," she responded by handing me a piece of religious literature. Go »Burning Microwave Popcorn
This guy puts all kinds of different crap in the microwave and films the results. My favorite is the eggs. Go »Free Rice
Site appears legitimate. Help feed the world by using your knowledge of vocabulary and donate rice to feed the hungry. Visit the home page of this website for the details and other interesting data (link from the game page) or just play the game. Go »
Scott Hardie | December 9, 2021
You'd be too distracted on the job by keeping a mental list of every weirdo you encountered so that you could blog about them later. :-)