Lucky Number 5
by Steve West on December 11, 2021
Brenda looked over my shoulder once to see what I was reading that made me chuckle. I told her it was an off-color joke involving the number 68. As it happened, she noticed that this joke appeared on page 68 of the book I was reading.
"You should probably play the lottery," she encouraged.
I responded, "I don't believe in stuff like that."
She asked, "Why not? It's better than most reasons."
So, I told her a story that happened before we were married.
Once, I woke up at 5:55 a.m. The temperature was 55 degrees and the humidity was 55%. I turned the TV to channel 5 and when I got up, saw that the date was May 5th. I thought it was a little creepy.
So, I go to work and see that my odometer read 55,555.5 miles. I get to work, go to the fifth floor and find I have 5 messages.
So, IT DAWNS ON ME!
I rushed to the racetrack. My entrance ticket cost me $5.00 and I'm ushered to Section 5, Row 5, Seat 5. In the fifth race, I pick the fifth horse. And with an understanding that Fate had spoken, I put my entire bank account on it.
Brenda was sure that I had won.
Anticlimactically, I told her, "My horse came in fifth. Therefore..."
Web Junkie
Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »
Inspiration
Go »The Miracle Of Marlboro
I'm old enough to remember cigarette ads on television. Most were (like all ads) ridiculously exaggerated concerning the adventures in coolness their product would bring. But these tobacco ads are intrinsically evil when promoting a product the manufacturers knew were killing people. Go »My Second Dad
Earlier this week, I lost my father-in-law to lung cancer. He was a beautiful man who welcomed me into his family after marrying his oldest daughter. Family isn’t always blood. Go »That's Good Eatin'
Recent conversation with Brenda: Brenda: (Looking through mailer) Would you like to go to Floyd's Barbecue? me: Why would I want that? Brenda: We could get $5.00 Go »Killer Home Decor (Literally)
From chalk outline welcome doormats to dead horse head pillows à la The Godfather (with protruding tongue, no less), this website features decorations to give your home that perfect serial killer feel. I especially like the pooling blood carpet. Go »
