Lucky Number 5 | Tragic Comedy

Brenda looked over my shoulder once to see what I was reading that made me chuckle. I told her it was an off-color joke involving the number 68. As it happened, she noticed that this joke appeared on page 68 of the book I was reading.
"You should probably play the lottery," she encouraged.
I responded, "I don't believe in stuff like that."
She asked, "Why not? It's better than most reasons."
So, I told her a story that happened before we were married.
Once, I woke up at 5:55 a.m. The temperature was 55 degrees and the humidity was 55%. I turned the TV to channel 5 and when I got up, saw that the date was May 5th. I thought it was a little creepy.
So, I go to work and see that my odometer read 55,555.5 miles. I get to work, go to the fifth floor and find I have 5 messages.
So, IT DAWNS ON ME!
I rushed to the racetrack. My entrance ticket cost me $5.00 and I'm ushered to Section 5, Row 5, Seat 5. In the fifth race, I pick the fifth horse. And with an understanding that Fate had spoken, I put my entire bank account on it.
Brenda was sure that I had won.
Anticlimactically, I told her, "My horse came in fifth. Therefore..."

Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Early Valentine Gift

Brenda woke up Saturday morning and said, "I just dreamed that you gave me a beautiful necklace for Valentine's Day. What do you think it means?" I told her, "You'll know tonight." Go »

Best Of Photojournalism

Perspective is everything. I look at some photographs that have been awarded a Pulitzer and understand immediately why. Others I look at and mentally shrug my shoulders. Go »

Strange Dreams

I dreamt that I had died and gone to Heaven. Brenda lived a few more years and then she passed. When she got to Heaven, she saw me and ran to me with open arms saying how much she had missed me. Go »

I'll Have the Seven Deadly Sins Combo

Funny chart that shows the resultant interactions of each of the seven deadly sins. Go »

Weekend Grocery Shopping Equals...

... another encounter with Ugly On A Stick. I had no idea she was even there until she went out of her way to shout, 'HiiiIIIiiiii' from an aisle away. Go »

Stay-cation Week IV

Brenda had a minor medical procedure today so we dropped the girls at Grandma's house for the majority of the day. Got through the procedure and had a nice lunch (just the two of us) at a local restaurant. I had a steak sandwich that was very tasty except it was served on ciabatta bread. Go »