Massage This
by Steve West on June 27, 2013
Recent conversation with Brenda:
(After a massage and dinner as a birthday gift from her sister) me: How was everything?
Brenda: I'm gonna be sore for the next few days. I made the mistake of asking for medium pressure.
me: I guess each massage parlor has its own definition of pressure like restaurants have for medium rare. Now the massage parlor I go to...
Brenda: I don't want to hear about the massage parlor you go to.
me: But they're the best! I think they invented the extremely localized shiatsu massage technique. They use it to squeeze bills from your wallet. Where was dinner?
Brenda: Don Pablo's (a local mexican restaurant).
me: I hope dinner was after the massage 'cause if you eat mexican and then have a beefy swedish lady squeeze you...
Brenda: Dinner was after the massage so stop now.
me: I'm just sayin'. So what was the massage lady wearing?
Brenda: I'm going away now.
Web Junkie
Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »
Happy Halloween
Back when I was about ten, I went trick or treating as a witch doctor. I got to a house that I didn't know who lived there and was greeted by a kindly looking old lady. When I routinely and without much enthusiaism stated, "Trick or treat," she responded by handing me a piece of religious literature. Go »The Magic Kingdom Is, Well...Magic
We just flew in from Orlando from a week's stay in Kissimmee, Florida. We had an incredible vacation that included the Magic Kingdom, Aquatica waterpark, a resort stay at Oak Plantation, Hollywood Studios, and Universal Citywalk including the Hard Rock Cafe, Bubba Gump Shrimp Co. and the Blue Man Group show. Go »I Tap My Magic Wand
This is just the coolest fountain. It may appear photoshopped but this actually has a pipe hidden within the water flow that supplies the water. I really have hopes that when I buy "Barbie's Dream House" (the euphemism my daughter and I use for our future house), a smaller version of this will be in my library. Go »Christmas Post #4: I Want A Piece Of Uranus
A former boss of mine once said something similar to me but not in those exact words. This site claims to be selling the planet Uranus. The text is presented very tongue in cheek but they do appear to be actually selling stuff; bumper stickers and mousepads that claim "I own Uranus". Go »Al Jolsen Meets The Handmaid's Tale
Brenda went to a local clothing store which I refuse to name so as not to give them any free advertising. I'm a little pissed at them right now. She bought Lauren some new clothes for school including a new pair of jeans for $15.00. Go »
