Narcissist
by Denise Sawicki on March 29, 2007
Oh lord, new worry, what if I'm a narcissist.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_Personality_Disorder
"NPD is considered to result from a person’s belief that he or she is flawed in a way that makes the person fundamentally unacceptable to others [8]. This belief is held below the person’s conscious awareness; such a person would typically deny thinking such a thing if questioned."
It doesn't fit altogether, I definitely believe I am flawed and fundamentally unacceptable but I am consciously aware of it and would not deny thinking such a thing if asked. I try to avoid any grandiosity, but sometimes I do have these cocky internal feelings. I do need lots of reassurance. I *get* tons of reassurance. I get told I'm great and I feel ashamed hearing it because I truly don't believe I'm great. Do people tell me I'm great all the time just because I go about fishing for it all the time? Perhaps I secretly seek to be told that all the time and that's why I hear it all the time?
Whatever's wrong with me I have the feeling it's one of those where I'd have to be locked up in a mental ward having myself brainwashed for 5 years in order to come out cured. Haha.
Here I am trying to seek narcissistic supply in the form of people telling me, "No, Denise, you're not a narcissist". haha. Well I'll disallow comments just to make myself appear less of a narcissist. There's no avoiding it really though.
Prayer for the Paranoid
Denise Sawicki posts whatever she feels able to post without serious consequences Read more »
Jesus songs
I wonder what it is with me liking all these songs that mention Jesus. I'm a total atheist :P Actually I think it might be easier for me to like these songs that it would be for anyone who's religious and might have a troubled background with religion. I guess the name has less significance for me. Go »People charging me money for nothing...
I guess the saga of me and numberonemusic.com is not over yet. They went and charged my credit card for another $59.95 Go »American Gothic
Well, for quite a while I have had nothing to say to anyone about anything and it is getting a bit claustrophobic. So I figured I should start saying some things into the void, dumb and trivial as they might be. A while back there was a video store closing sale so we picked up a number of TV series on DVD at 75% off. Go »Free stuff bandits
So we discovered that the limited edition "holiday" flavors of that Swiss chocolate are secretly on sale for 90% off... so we went and bought out all the gingerbread chocolate from the Target stores in Fargo and Moorhead, haha. We are so evil. Go »Why have I not checked this show out before?...
So I happened to find disk 1.1 of Queer as Folk (American version) at the library and it is rare to see disk 1.1 of anything so I checked it out. Go »
