Narcissist
by Denise Sawicki on March 29, 2007

Oh lord, new worry, what if I'm a narcissist.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_Personality_Disorder
"NPD is considered to result from a person’s belief that he or she is flawed in a way that makes the person fundamentally unacceptable to others [8]. This belief is held below the person’s conscious awareness; such a person would typically deny thinking such a thing if questioned."
It doesn't fit altogether, I definitely believe I am flawed and fundamentally unacceptable but I am consciously aware of it and would not deny thinking such a thing if asked. I try to avoid any grandiosity, but sometimes I do have these cocky internal feelings. I do need lots of reassurance. I *get* tons of reassurance. I get told I'm great and I feel ashamed hearing it because I truly don't believe I'm great. Do people tell me I'm great all the time just because I go about fishing for it all the time? Perhaps I secretly seek to be told that all the time and that's why I hear it all the time?
Whatever's wrong with me I have the feeling it's one of those where I'd have to be locked up in a mental ward having myself brainwashed for 5 years in order to come out cured. Haha.
Here I am trying to seek narcissistic supply in the form of people telling me, "No, Denise, you're not a narcissist". haha. Well I'll disallow comments just to make myself appear less of a narcissist. There's no avoiding it really though.
Prayer for the Paranoid
Denise Sawicki posts whatever she feels able to post without serious consequences Read more »

D&D first impressions
So our books came yesterday and I've been reading the Dungeon Master's guide as scheduled while Darrell's been reading the Player's Handbook. It's quite obvious I am going to have to read the Player's Handbook too since there is not so much actual useful information in the DM guide. It has lots of pages about different playing styles, how to handle different personalities in your group, and weird stuff like how to write cryptograms, but not so much useful data on the actual rules. Go »
Would you like the receipt with you, or in the bag?
I don't really understand why people ask this. Doesn't it take longer to ask this question and wait for the answer than to just let the person do what they please with the receipt? Oh well. Go »
D&D update
The guys made it to 4th level and then we added 2 new characters. We had a dragonborn warlord and an elf ranger, at 4th level we added an eladrin wizard and a dwarf fighter. Darrell is playing the fighter and warlord, Darrin has the ranger (though he's not exactly into the game so we're lucky if we're able to call him to the table to actually make his dice rolls) and I got the wizard even though I'm DM :-P. Go »
My weekend
Hmm well I hope this post is appearing in my blog, maybe I am a bit confused by the changes. I was worried we would have a bad weekend, because we had no DVDs from Netflix or the library, and our AC isn't working and it's been really hot. But finally the weekend was saved by the ultra quick arrival on Saturday of Sims 2 which I ordered Thursday... Go »
A girl wants to meet me
I'm scared of girls. Go »