Narcissist
by Denise Sawicki on March 29, 2007
Oh lord, new worry, what if I'm a narcissist.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_Personality_Disorder
"NPD is considered to result from a person’s belief that he or she is flawed in a way that makes the person fundamentally unacceptable to others [8]. This belief is held below the person’s conscious awareness; such a person would typically deny thinking such a thing if questioned."
It doesn't fit altogether, I definitely believe I am flawed and fundamentally unacceptable but I am consciously aware of it and would not deny thinking such a thing if asked. I try to avoid any grandiosity, but sometimes I do have these cocky internal feelings. I do need lots of reassurance. I *get* tons of reassurance. I get told I'm great and I feel ashamed hearing it because I truly don't believe I'm great. Do people tell me I'm great all the time just because I go about fishing for it all the time? Perhaps I secretly seek to be told that all the time and that's why I hear it all the time?
Whatever's wrong with me I have the feeling it's one of those where I'd have to be locked up in a mental ward having myself brainwashed for 5 years in order to come out cured. Haha.
Here I am trying to seek narcissistic supply in the form of people telling me, "No, Denise, you're not a narcissist". haha. Well I'll disallow comments just to make myself appear less of a narcissist. There's no avoiding it really though.
Prayer for the Paranoid
Denise Sawicki posts whatever she feels able to post without serious consequences Read more »
Londo and Life
I woke up in the mood to write quite a bit but I feel my communication skills have fled me as of late, if indeed I ever had any to begin with. I can only hope someone out there will make some sense out of this. Yesterday was the big day at the convention and it was cool. Go »False Hope
So the guys' band had a show on Saturday and it went really well. A bunch of people came up to say they did a good job, and the headlining band (another local act) really liked the music and wants to do other shows together. And they even got paid! Go »Sewing Project?
So... we are into this goofy show "The Prisoner" lately and decided we want to go as people from that show for Halloween. That is, assuming anyone invites us to a party of any kind. Go »Now I remember why I live in North Dakota
It got hot all of a sudden the last few days, or what passes for hot in ND in early April (50s). It's like a spring break video out there, people prancing around in bikinis yelling "woo"... OK not quite but there is a marked change in demeanor. Go »Weather - the most boring conversational topic?!?
Well, perhaps not if you live in ND, I dunno. There's snow on the ground *and* dandelions in the lawn right now. That's a first, at least in my memory. Go »
