Recent conversation with Brenda:

Brenda: How was your day?

Me: It was going so well until I got chased by a police dog.

Brenda: Oh, sweet lord, why was a police dog chasing you?

Me: I'm not sure. Maybe it was the Beggin' Strips t-shirt I was wearing.

Brenda: I told you that shirt was ridiculous.

Me: Whatever. But as a Public Service Announcement, if you're being chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel, then onto a little see-saw, then jump through a ring of fire. Apparently, they're trained for that.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Danger Will Robinson!

We've probably all seen examples of stupid warning labels but there's a few here I had never seen before. Also, the menu on the right side of this page has some interesting features. And remember, don't eat the iPod shuffle! Go »

Pedants 'R' Us

Today, we attended a celebration for a very good friend of mine whose daughter was graduating High School. It got me thinking in an educational mode so I thought I'd share a pictorial overview of air quotes. Go »

I'm a Doctor, Not a Kitchen Appliance!

My toaster has a timer on it that let's you know when it's finished. It seems a little silly to add a timer beeping that's a redundant addition to the toast loudly popping up from the machine that means the same thing. So now, because the timer emits a sound eerily similar to an EKG indicating flatline, every time it goes off I'll say to Brenda, "He's bread, Jim." Go »

All Aboard The Idiot Train

I swear that lately, I feel like the proverbial snowball that inexorably turns into an avalanche. Yesterday, I was unloading the van of the last of the grass needed to complete the front yard landscaping. Only 170 square feet so it wouldn't take long. Go »

The Magic Kingdom Is, Well...Magic

We just flew in from Orlando from a week's stay in Kissimmee, Florida. We had an incredible vacation that included the Magic Kingdom, Aquatica waterpark, a resort stay at Oak Plantation, Hollywood Studios, and Universal Citywalk including the Hard Rock Cafe, Bubba Gump Shrimp Co. and the Blue Man Group show. Go »

I'm Too Young To Be Old

All of this landscaping has taken a serious toll on my aged body, apparently. I actually had to take a day off from work to recover from an aching back. When younger (twenties), I could chop a load of firewood blah blah blah. Go »