Flight of the Conchords rule!

2 Quarts of Tanning Lotion, Stat!
Lots of stuff spilled in the road by trucks.
These dolls define my childhood heroes.
Week's worth of dumbasses - I'm the crab guy halfway through.
M*A*S*H stars, Where Are They Now? Who knew Loretta Swit was 70? Liar.
Brand names that will soon disappear. K-mart, Old Navy, Motorola, Dodge...
Latest "Deep Thoughts" by Jack Handey.
A good friend of mine admitted to wearing dragon's eyes contacts when she was a teenager. "It was a phase I passed through." Now she can relive those awkward teenage years with lots and lots of choices. F/X contacts.
Stand-up of the week: Anjelah Johnson


Three Replies to I'm Down To My Socks... It's Posting Time.

Amy Austin | March 8, 2008
That's it? Aww, yeah, that's it. I hope this doesn't mean that posting hours are over, Steve... ever!

Once again -- in case no one else is as curious enough like I am to read the follow-up comments...
Earth boys are sleazy! (And I'm pretty sure I saw Derek Zoolander's yang-twin in there...)

Steve West | March 8, 2008
That link was just as funny as the one I found. Zoolander, haha!

Amy Austin | March 8, 2008
Going back, it actually appears that there were a few Dereks in there, but I think you know the one I'm talking about, right? Matilda was right there along with him! ;-D

Wow, so my new computer is likely to be one of the last Gateways, huh... that's kind of sad. As are a few others on the list. Ahh... c'est la vie.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Definitely A Hatchet Murderer

My car broke down at an intersection less than a mile from my work. I have roadside assistance but I couldn't read the fine print on the handy card they provided. The fine print was where the number was. Go »

Back to School Night

We just got back from the titular event and I have to say, I love my kids' school. Lauren is in 3rd grade and Olivia is in the autism program in 1st grade. Lauren has one teacher and Olivia has at least three (more if you count her speech therapist, occupational therapist, and physical therapist). Go »

One and One-half Is Not the Same As Two

Recent conversation with Brenda: me: There are not two scoops of raisins in my Raisin Bran. Brenda: Excuse me? me: There appears to be less than two scoops of raisins in my cereal box. Go »

I'll Have The Misogyny Au Gratin, Please

We were having dinner with my nephew the other night and the conversation steered toward his numerous relationships. He replied with that standard chauvinistic response, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?" My wife looked at him directly and retorted, "Yeah, why buy the whole pig for just a little sausage?" Go »

I'm Like Evander Holyfield Except With Two Entire Ears

Recent conversation with Brenda. Brenda: My aunt just had a birthday. She's 94. Go »

Christmas and a Lizard's Tale

One Christmas when Lauren was eight, like a lot of girls her age, wished for a pony. My backyard at the time was about the size of a Volkswagen Minibus. Despite her assurances that she would let it roam the neighborhood for sufficient exercise, I said, “Not this year,” as I pictured myself following the horse with a pooper scooper. Go »