Recent conversation with Brenda:

Me: (after winning the wishbone break) Dead chicken says I get my wish.

Brenda: What did you wish for?

Me: What's your greatest fantasy?

Brenda: Fourteen hours of sleep followed by a buffet breakfast.

Me: Aren't you fortunate that I'm great in bed? I can sleep there all day.

Brenda: And then make breakfast?

Me: Hey, wait. Dead chicken said I won.

Brenda: Make sure he's on the menu.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Me and Al Bundy

Recently, Brenda made the mistake of asking me to fix the toilet. It seemed to have gunk in the thingy that supplies the water and would only filll if I poked it with a paper clip in the spout thingy. You can tell I'm a semi-professional because of all the technical jargon. Go »

Gettin' The Animals Out Of My Blog Folder

Time to clear out the animal clutter from my blog folder. Want to make your dog look really tough like the dogs from medieval times? Try some doggie armor. Go »

Is This Your Dog?

Recent conversation with Brenda: Me: I just got a text from a Facebook friend that was funny and cruel at the same time. Brenda: Do I want to hear this? Me: He saw a "Missing Dog" poster, called the number and only barked. Go »

Barbie Gets Implants

In the early ‘90’s, I heard a stand-up routine by Cathy Ladman in which she was buying a Barbie doll as a birthday present for her niece. She’s looking at the doll displays and her eye catches a “Gift-Giving Ken”. She says, I really don’t think this is gonna prepare her for adult relationships. Go »

Sometimes Romance is Spontaneous

My parents (both passed) dearly loved each other. But with jobs, children, and other business, they found little time to spend on just the two of them. One evening when I was visiting, my Dad came up behind my Mom in the kitchen where she was doing dishes. Go »

Accidents Happen But This Is Ridiculous

You know, I've accidentally glued various parts of my body to odd things before. I glued my shirt to my stomach, once. But this guy takes the glue cake. Go »