Sleep, Really?
by Steve West on December 6, 2024
Recent conversation with Brenda:
Me: (after winning the wishbone break) Dead chicken says I get my wish.
Brenda: What did you wish for?
Me: What's your greatest fantasy?
Brenda: Fourteen hours of sleep followed by a buffet breakfast.
Me: Aren't you fortunate that I'm great in bed? I can sleep there all day.
Brenda: And then make breakfast?
Me: Hey, wait. Dead chicken said I won.
Brenda: Make sure he's on the menu.
Web Junkie
Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »
That Guy With The Glasses
Small representative sample of the films presented "in 5 seconds". Several are inspired by the original joke and many last more than 5 seconds, but all are abridged to hilarious result. These are my favorites: Rocky I, II, III, IV, V, & VI; Scarface; Snakes On A Plane; Titanic; and Gladiator. Go »Hair's The Thing
I just got back from getting a haircut. I sat in the chair at a local salon and reminisced about my childhood and accompanying my father to his weekly hair trimmings. We went to a pretty old-fashioned Mayberry barbershop in suburban DC that was the Italian version of Floyd's. Go »Santa Claus Can Kiss My Ass
That title is almost blasphemous in the American belief system, I know. We took the girls to a local ice cream store, Coldstone's, to get ice cream and to see and get a photograph taken with Santa. It occured to me that Santa gets a lot of credit for stuff that I do and provide. Go »If I Were To Make A Children's Show...
...it would be similar to this promo for The Crime Channel featuring Gali the Alligator. The lyrics are a little hard to understand so I've attempted to transcribe them here. Go »Christmas and a Lizard's Tale
One Christmas when Lauren was eight, like a lot of girls her age, wished for a pony. My backyard at the time was about the size of a Volkswagen Minibus. Despite her assurances that she would let it roam the neighborhood for sufficient exercise, I said, “Not this year,” as I pictured myself following the horse with a pooper scooper. Go »
