I'm Like Tyson Without a Face Tattoo
by Steve West on April 4, 2012
Recent conversation with Brenda:
Brenda: Where did you get that scar?
me: Which one?
Brenda: The one between your eyes.
me: I was in a bar fight in college and I got poleaxed with a barstool.
Brenda: You? Bar fight? I can't see it. You get squeamish removing a bandaid.
me: I can take care of myself.
Brenda: I'm not sure you could survive a physical encounter with the Olsen twins.
me: Only because there's two of them.
Two Replies to I'm Like Tyson Without a Face Tattoo
Steve West | April 8, 2012
She no longer works at my Safeway, much to my chagrin, joy, and displeasure simultaneously. Her replacements aren't nearly as painfully delicious.
Web Junkie
Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »
Information, Please...
Shortly after I obtained my driver's license, I got brave enough to travel a longer distance than the liquor store. I headed to Gettysburg, Pennsylvania to visit the historic battlefield. I had always been a Civil War nut (short of reenactments) and Antietam I had seen recently (someone else drove). Go »Dumb Criminals And Other Court Type Stuff
Small potpourri of MENSA reject criminals, frivolous lawsuits and just dumb laws. Cupcake Burglar; Cheeseburger Lawsuit; Drunken Sock Eater; Saggy Trouser Law; and Goofy Streaker. The most shocking story to me is this last one in which a victimized Kirsten Dunst had her room burgled and items stolen including a $13,000 handbag. Go »Crash Test Your Car
Curious about the performance of your car, or any other for that matter, in a crash test? Watch crash dummy after crash dummy suffer serious neck injury in front and side impact crash tests. You pick the make,model and year of car but sadly not the face painted on the dummy. Go »7-Eleven's Legacy
Aside from selling lottery tickets, 7-Eleven stores are recognizable by two products; Slurpees and Big Gulps. All, I mean all, of their food products should have E. Coli warnings on them and an ingredients list that says "some kind of meat, we think". Go »What Is This, Miami Beach?
Once again, I have to preface this by saying South Dakota snow stories are much more impressive, I'm sure. But here in DC it doesn't get much heavier than this. A couple of feet in a two day period left a lot of snow to be shovelled out of the way. Go »
Scott Hardie | April 8, 2012
Speaking of facial disfigurement, what's new with Ugly On A Stick? I haven't seen an update in a while.