I'm Like Tyson Without a Face Tattoo
by Steve West on April 4, 2012
Recent conversation with Brenda:
Brenda: Where did you get that scar?
me: Which one?
Brenda: The one between your eyes.
me: I was in a bar fight in college and I got poleaxed with a barstool.
Brenda: You? Bar fight? I can't see it. You get squeamish removing a bandaid.
me: I can take care of myself.
Brenda: I'm not sure you could survive a physical encounter with the Olsen twins.
me: Only because there's two of them.
Two Replies to I'm Like Tyson Without a Face Tattoo
Steve West | April 8, 2012
She no longer works at my Safeway, much to my chagrin, joy, and displeasure simultaneously. Her replacements aren't nearly as painfully delicious.
Web Junkie
Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »
Crazy For You, Baby
Recent conversation with Brenda: me: You know how crazy I am for you? Brenda: Crazy enough to raise three kids. me: I'm crazy enough to ignore the voices in my head when we talk. Go »Japanese Terebi Game Shows 2
Sometimes clever but usually hilarious clips from one particularly wacky game show. Human Tetris I; Human Tetris II; Human Tetris III. Go »My Man-Crush On The Mickster Is Almost Over
How much nonsense can a guy overlook? Apparently, Mickey Rourke has found Jesus. Now, if he could only remember the church he was at so he could return him. Go »This Was No Boat Accident
Vacation Tip #2: Maybe you're into sharks, pun intended. I, myself, am not. For the longest time this has been my greatest fear; being eaten alive by a wild animal. Go »Coolest Home Theater Ever
Chance of impressing your friends: 100% Chance of getting laid: Somewhat lower. This is definitely going to be a part of Barbie's Dream House. Especially if it comes with a replicator. Go »
Scott Hardie | April 8, 2012
Speaking of facial disfigurement, what's new with Ugly On A Stick? I haven't seen an update in a while.