Recent conversation with Brenda:

Brenda: You look so busy. What are you working on now?

Me: An advertisement for a cologne for introverts that hasn't been created yet. Gonna need help with that part. Chanel... Dior, maybe.

Brenda: What's so special about it?

Me: Right now, just the name.

Brenda: What's it called?

Me: LEAVE ME, THE FA COLOGNE.

Brenda: You better hope for a lot of on-line sales.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Taking Bets for 2021

Volcano? Locusts? Asteroid? Go »

My Second Dad

Earlier this week, I lost my father-in-law to lung cancer. He was a beautiful man who welcomed me into his family after marrying his oldest daughter. Family isn’t always blood. Go »

Carnivores R Us

Someone in my neighborhood added his own sign to a nearby STOP sign which implored people to become vegetarian by adding "eating animals". Rather than tear off his sign, I added my own which read "without steak sauce". Go »

I'm a Doctor, Not a Kitchen Appliance!

My toaster has a timer on it that let's you know when it's finished. It seems a little silly to add a timer beeping that's a redundant addition to the toast loudly popping up from the machine that means the same thing. So now, because the timer emits a sound eerily similar to an EKG indicating flatline, every time it goes off I'll say to Brenda, "He's bread, Jim." Go »

Insanity is Relative

Recent conversation with Brenda. Me: You know those signs that say 'Keep Off the Grass'? Brenda: Of course. Go »

Halloween 2015

A pretty fun time again this year. My brother and his wife hosted a costume party and because Cheryl is a breast cancer survivor, she requested that each costume contain a touch of pink. I carried around a baguette and sang I Want to Rock 'n' Roll All Night in French (Je veux du rock 'n roll tour le soir, et jeter tour la jour). Go »