Recent conversation with Brenda:

Brenda: Why are you all wet?

Me: I knocked a plant off the kitchen counter.

Brenda: The plant got you that wet?

Me: No, the cat saw me.

Brenda: And???

Me: So, I squirted myself with a water bottle.

Brenda: I'm sure this makes sense in your world.

Me: I had to show him that the law is applied equally.

Brenda: You're a good Dad.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Number 10. He's Gay As A Caballero

"The Nose on Your Face" gives their top 9 possible explanations for Senator Larry Craig's airport bathroom behavior. Go »

Double Talk with a Forked Tongue

I've decided that from now on, I'm going to answer every question like a presidential candidate. Friend (voter): "Steve, what are you gonna do this weekend?" Me (blahblahblah): "That's a great question and an important one. Go »

All Aboard...

This week's trainwreck of links. Everything goes well with bacon. I repeat, everything goes well with bacon. Go »

I'm Like Evander Holyfield Except With Two Entire Ears

Recent conversation with Brenda. Brenda: My aunt just had a birthday. She's 94. Go »

Shaken And Stirred Too For Good Measure

Semi-bizarre gallery devoted to people shaking their faces, having any loose skin flop around, and photographing the results. Go »

Oscars 2012

Now that I can make no further changes to my picks, I'd like to hear about the categories people wrestled with most. I struggled most with costume, documentary and even adapted screenplay. Goodl luck everyone! Go »