Recent conversation with Brenda:

Brenda: Why are you all wet?

Me: I knocked a plant off the kitchen counter.

Brenda: The plant got you that wet?

Me: No, the cat saw me.

Brenda: And???

Me: So, I squirted myself with a water bottle.

Brenda: I'm sure this makes sense in your world.

Me: I had to show him that the law is applied equally.

Brenda: You're a good Dad.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Thorough Movie Reviews Revisited

Are you one of the group of people, like myself, who insist that they are not influenced by movie critics and make your film choices based on whim, fancy, instinct or some other method completely unrelated to some "professional's" opinion? Perhaps you should visit this website where you can rate (not review) movies yourself, and compare the result with a series of national reviewers to see whose opinion most closely matches yours. Maybe that particular reviewer deserves a second look since you two seem to be on similar movie viewing wavelengths. Go »

Insanity is Relative

Recent conversation with Brenda. Me: You know those signs that say 'Keep Off the Grass'? Brenda: Of course. Go »

My Ball Got Whacked With Monkey Poo

I love miniature golf. Back in college, I spent many a drunken evening goofing off with friends, avoiding the last few pages of a term paper, or just getting the cheap thrill of pretending you're an athlete by getting your ball into Mickey Mouse's left eye to win a free game. Eat me, Arnold Palmer! Go »

Christmas Post #3: Syphilis For Christmas

Lyme disease, E. Coli, and even Mad Cow are all available to gift your loved one with as a plush toy. Be sure to check the venereal section! Go »

Catching Up On 2011

Not that I think my life is that interesting but writing about stuff is a little therapeutic. Highlights in a nutshell: Both girls are routinely making Honor Roll. The work Brenda and I have to do to help make that happen - not routine. Go »

Christmas Post #6: Beer Foam = Food

I showed this product to my wife and said, "If it only had a urinal, I would never leave the rec room." "But what would you eat?", she asked. Go »