A woman attacked a karaoke singer while he was singing Coldplay. A similar thing happened to me once. I was pretty drunk and I started a fight with some guy singing Dave Matthews. It turns out I was at a Dave Matthews concert.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Mariah and the Subtle Burn

Recent conversation with Brenda (after hearing All I Want for Christmas... again): Me: Mariah Carey beginning with "I don't want a lot for Christmas..." and then revealing she wants "you" is kind of a burn, Brenda: She could mean that she doesn't want a lot of other gifts and only wants her man friend. Go »

The Magic Kingdom Is, Well...Magic

We just flew in from Orlando from a week's stay in Kissimmee, Florida. We had an incredible vacation that included the Magic Kingdom, Aquatica waterpark, a resort stay at Oak Plantation, Hollywood Studios, and Universal Citywalk including the Hard Rock Cafe, Bubba Gump Shrimp Co. and the Blue Man Group show. Go »

Worst. Playground Toys. Ever.

"Mommy! Mommy! Can I crawl up the elephant's butt? Go »

Christmas and a Lizard's Tale

One Christmas when Lauren was eight, like a lot of girls her age, wished for a pony. My backyard at the time was about the size of a Volkswagen Minibus. Despite her assurances that she would let it roam the neighborhood for sufficient exercise, I said, “Not this year,” as I pictured myself following the horse with a pooper scooper. Go »

Barbie Gets Implants

In the early ‘90’s, I heard a stand-up routine by Cathy Ladman in which she was buying a Barbie doll as a birthday present for her niece. She’s looking at the doll displays and her eye catches a “Gift-Giving Ken”. She says, I really don’t think this is gonna prepare her for adult relationships. Go »

Really Cheap Costumes

Looking for a great photo for a future Halloween section in that photo album you can show the grandkids? Just wear one of these T-shirts. And then get arrested. Go »