Wherefore Art Thou ----?

Scott Hardie | October 17, 2004
A three-part poll:

How did you get your name?

If you have children, how did you choose their names? If not yet, how do you think you'll name your kids someday?

Do you feel obligated to fulfill child-naming traditions within your family or your partner's family?

David Mitzman | October 17, 2004
1) Was going to be named David Andrew, but then my initials would've been DAM and my parents weren't keen on that.

2) I might name my kids after a deceased relative but most likely I'll go with a name I like.

3) No

Anthony Lewis | October 17, 2004
I have no idea how I got my name, but I have my kids names planned out (when I have them).

My first son will likely be named Sterling. My first daughter will be named Shayne. If my wife doesn't like it...too bad. I refuse to handicap my children's future by giving them some outrageous name.

Jackie Mason | October 17, 2004
[hidden by request]

Kris Weberg | October 17, 2004
1) Parents stalled between an Indian name ("Huri" -- pronounced like "hurry") and an Anerican name ("Sam" -- pronounced like "Sam"), and compromised on "Kris," between "Krishna" and "Christopher." The idea was that I could 'pick" at 18. Ilike what I got.

2) I do not plan to have children.

3) See above.

Scott Horowitz | October 18, 2004
1) First name is from my father's aunt, middle name from his grandmother

2) it is jewish customer to name children after deceased relatives, and I will continue that custom.

3) See number 2.

Lori Lancaster | October 18, 2004
[hidden by request]

Anna Gregoline | October 18, 2004
My great-grandmothers on both sides of the family were named Anna. My mom wanted to name me Nina, but the rest of the family insisted on Anna.

With everyone naming their children "unique" names, I think I will stick with classic names that aren't necessarily common. This will help them stand out. I certainly want people to be able to pronounce and spell their names too. Girls names are easy - boys names are harder. I haven't thought too much about it - and my boyfriend's last name is Thomas, so name combinations aren't too tricky to navigate.

Do you feel obligated to fulfill child-naming traditions within your family or your partner's family?

Not much. Jesse's middle name is Paul, as is his dad's, after somebody, but if that's the tradition, I'd almost rather name our kid's middle name as Jesse.

Jackie Mason | October 18, 2004
[hidden by request]

Anna Gregoline | October 18, 2004
First name, Jackie? I've always been curious about naming kids "juniors."

Jackie Mason | October 18, 2004
[hidden by request]

Kris Weberg | October 19, 2004
I'm surprised that George Foreman hasn't been mentioned yet.

Amy Austin | October 19, 2004
First... Scott Horowitz: You have an aunt named "Scott"?

(Or is that a derivative?) One of my best friends is also named after an aunt with a man's name -- "Nigel" -- but *she* goes by her middle name, "Denise"... I just have a hard time imagining "Aunt Scottie"!

Lori: Congrats on expecting again -- I read it in the photos post first, and I believed you when you say that you always look good... you are a "pretty little kid" today!

(So hopefully, now, you won't hate me when I tell you my first thought on your daughter's name... and I wasn't realizing that you already had a daughter and named her when I was thinking it, so please don't be mad at me, but... I can't help but think of a feminine commercial!) I like "Serena" better, and my maternal grandmother (never knew her -- committed suicide before I was born) went by her middle name of "Eve" (first name "Artis", which I found interesting!)

"Everett" is my mother's son's middle name (a much younger half-brother), and I used to live in Everett, WA -- a beautiful place. I like it. And I've always loved the name "Maximilian" -- even better because it's so Roman warrior/sci-fi sounding... a strong name.

And I like that you play with the bi-racial blend -- that's cool, too. Forgive my ignorance here (you learn something new every day, right?), but what are "abuelito/abuelita"s? I suppose I could have looked it up, instead of asking, but maybe I'm not the only one who doesn't know... I am interested.

Scott Horowitz | October 19, 2004
My aun't's name was Sadie, they made it masculine to Scott.

Amy Austin | October 19, 2004
I was the first-born, and my folks argued over my name -- a trend that didn't end there, but in divorce when I was 11. Supposedly, my father wanted to name me "Elizabeth", but my mother insisted that it was a girl he was too fond of and didn't want it -- so it was my middle name. I guess "Amy" was a compromise that neither of them was especially fond of... how romantic, right?

Cut to, the naming of my younger sister (and my only sibling of the same two parents): Kerry Ann -- born on my folks' wedding anniversary and so named for "Kathy" & "Jerry"... isn't that sweet? (BARF)

I have name issues of all sorts -- I think jrs are a stupid thing (although my dad's son is one, but goes by "Jay"), and I wouldn't do it, just because I'm a big proponent of individuality (life in the military was not always easy for someone like me!) -- and George Foreman is the worst!!!

Legally, I have not changed my name since marriage, which was a big stink for quite some time. I hate being called "Mrs." because of its origin -- I prefer "Ms." always, "Miss" if you're under 18 only. I hate that my husband took such offense about the name change, but it was both a matter of principle and of practicality for me: in the military, you are known by your last name -- and that becomes your identity to an extent that civilians just don't know. To me, changing my name would be like answering when I heard my husband's name, not mine -- I hear it, and I instictively look for him... So why is it that only women are expected to make that adjustment? Well, I know why, and I don't think that's right -- even if it is just a holdover of patriarchy.

And I am not alone -- another of my best friends felt the same way. She married only 3 months before I did, and after the same big name stink, chose to hyphenate. I don't like this, either... it seems fussy when non-Hispanic types do it (sorry if I offend, certainly not trying) -- although I like how Hispanics have both of their parents' names. (I just don't understand how it's perpetuated!) Now, she -- like my other friend -- is divorced and reverting back to her name. What if old "Bob" had to do the same thing? Wonder how he would feel about it...

Anyway, forgive me if I sound impassioned -- I have strong opinions about a lot of things that seem like nothing. But just to clarify -- what you see here is, in fact, my preferred use of my married name... without hyphen, but without obligation. My legal name is still the same as when I was born, though. There is more to my husband's side of the story, but for brevity's sake... maybe later.

Amy Austin | October 19, 2004
Ah -- good to know... I didn't realize that "Sadie" was the feminization of "Scott" -- it's a pretty name. I hope that you felt my facetiousness in asking, Scott!

Anna Gregoline | October 19, 2004
abuelito/abuelita = grandpa/grandma

Anna Gregoline | October 19, 2004
And I agree with you - when I get married, I'm not changing my name. I'm not going to get crazy about it if I go by my husband's name socially, but besides all the hassle of getting it changed, I don't like the idea that I lose my identity just by getting married!

Amy Austin | October 19, 2004
Thanks, Anna!

Lori Lancaster | October 19, 2004
[hidden by request]

Amy Austin | October 20, 2004
Thanks, Lori -- I'm glad you weren't mad... ^_^ (heehee -- or being conceited -- I just thought it was funny in light of your other comment!)

I thought of "Serendipity" as well -- but how can a child with that name resist getting stuck with the nickname "Dip"?!

Oh, and I remembered something else about my grandmother's middle name -- it was actually "Evangeline"... don't know why it didn't occur to me earlier (well, it's not like we were familiar). But she did go by "Eve".

I gathered your interest in sci-fi/fantasy -- all the nicer that Max came from your abuelito... ^_^ I would want to call him that.

Oddly enough, I had another ex- with your last name, too (Lancaster) -- did you know that in Pennsylvania they pronounce it like "Lankster" vs. "Lancaster" (I'm assuming that you say it that way)? I guess that's some sort of GB holdover. Funny, too -- his father was Mexican, and I didn't think that was such a Mexican-sounding name. Just goes to show... you can't always judge by the cover!

Speaking of that, I thought your German incident was hilarious -- well handled! Always try to disarm with wit -- love it!

Scott Hardie | October 20, 2004
The "junior" tradition is a nuisance. No disrespect to the fathers of juniors, but doesn't it seem so egotistical?

I'm with Anna, I want to give my kids "real" names that are not common. Adele is a favorite; so is Tyler. I'd name them after famous people I respect highly if there were any that seemed appropriate. Naming them after friends just seems complicated; I wouldn't like trying to keep my daughter Anna separate from my friend Anna, for instance. And that comes back to the "junior" issue.

I started this discussion with interest in the third question in particular: What do you think of naming traditions in your family? Would you maintain them? Family is important, but it seems to me that the name your child will have for their entire life is more important than a tradition with fewer occurrences than you could count on the fingers of one hand. To follow my family's tradition, I'd have to name my son James after my father (I'm named for my grandfather), but when I have a son I'll want him to have a separate, unique identity. I also wouldn't want to have a grandson named Scott. Who wants to be in a family where the sons only have one of two names?

Anna Gregoline | October 20, 2004
I LOVE Adele. Cool.