Chatt Story
by Scott Hardie on May 16, 2023
Kelly and I are home from a brief road trip to Chattanooga.
The primary reason for going was the wedding of an old friend of Kelly. The ceremony was beautiful, held on the banks of Fall Creek Falls Lake, with some of the best-written vows I've ever heard, at once personal and profound. Then we got to kick back with other old friends at the reception, laughing for hours and catching up. That was a wonderful night. My only regret is being both over and under dressed: The bride and groom met through a medieval LARP, so the wedding had a medieval theme, and I expected to be one of the few non-LARPers wearing a traditional suit, but it turned out that I was the only person not wearing medieval garb. Still, it was fun to stop at a gas station at midnight on the way home and watch people try to guess what I in my suit and Kelly in her medieval dress were doing at that hour.
The day before that, we did as Tennessee's barns have commanded for generations and saw Rock City, a mountaintop attraction famous for its hiking trails and expansive view from the top. If you visit a major theme park while overweight, employees will sometimes discreetly let you know about a private area off to the side of each attraction's entrance where you can try fitting into a demo ride vehicle, and I wish that Rock City had a similar way to test some of its tight squeezes before we got partway up the trail and discovered that there was no way for me to fit through the narrow passages through the limestone. Once we transitioned to the accessible trail segments, it was a much more pleasant experience, and we were in such good moods by the end that we couldn't resist bringing home a garden gnome, the attraction's signature souvenir.
We also visited the Chattanooga Zoo, which was as calming and pleasant as every zoo I've ever visited, except perhaps for the odor inside the reptile building. I don't know when zoos became merely the stuff of school field trips and parental desperation to take the kids somewhere, because as a childless adult, I've always found them to be soothing and rejuvenating experiences. There's something about the peace of wild things that makes me forget my problems and relax, in spite of the caging of animals that I find more ethically problematic with each passing year. Chattanooga's zoo is wonderful, but you don't have to be there to get the same experience; go check out your local city zoo the next time that you need to check out.
One Reply to Chatt Story
Logical Operator
The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »
Unmitigated Gall
Life gets unpleasant quickly when your gallbladder stops working. TMI alert. I spent all day Friday with sharp pain in my abdomen, diagnosed as spasms from my gallbladder trying to expel a stone. Go »More Than Meets the Eye
Paramount is holding a contest in which one lucky fan will have their line of dialogue added to the upcoming Transformers movie, spoken in character by Optimus Prime. (link) I wonder if they'll take my submission: "I want these motherfucking Decepticons off this motherfucking plane!" Go »Risky Games
Here's plugging two games that I've been enjoying lately: Dice Wars is a good little miniature online game for one person, playable in about 20 minutes and very satisfying for its size. The text below the game explains the rules, but suffice to say, it's basically Risk but built to be played rapidly thanks to some rule simplification and a very swift AI. (Thanks for suggesting it, Joandy!) Go »Weight-Loss Wednesday: The Stress Test
Two weeks ago, I wound up in the hospital for what I worried was a heart attack, but turned out to be back spasms caused by too much weight on my frame. Either way, the lesson was ominous: Lose weight, or spend a lot more time in the hospital in the future. I would like to document my progress here on Wednesdays as I undertake this long journey. Go »Ten Stress-Relieving Tips for Visiting Walt Disney World
I know a few people visiting the self-proclaimed Happiest Place on Earth for the first time in 2008, and I've been there a lot, so here's what I tell them. 1) Go during the off-season: Between Thanksgiving and Christmas Eve, or between New Years and Valentines Day. The hotels are a fraction of their normal cost, the Florida weather is dry and cool, and best of all, park attendance is at a minimum. Go »
Matthew Preston | May 17, 2023
Sounds like you had an awesome time in my hometown! If I wasn't 2,000+ miles away on a business trip, I would have loved to enjoy these things with you guys.
If you ever make it back, I highly recommend Raccoon Mountain reservoir. It's a hydro pump for the local power utility and the surrounding areas are open to the public. There's a one lane road you can drive around with multiple stops for amazing views of the city. It's one of those trips you can mostly enjoy from your car, but still enjoy nature.