I've decided that from now on, I'm going to answer every question like a presidential candidate.

Friend (voter): "Steve, what are you gonna do this weekend?"

Me (blahblahblah): "That's a great question and an important one. And I WILL do something this weekend. But let me take a step back and answer a broader question. What are we ALL doing this weekend? As a nation? As a world? This weekend I will do something comprehensive and robust, yet fun. We all should."

Friend (frustrated voter): "But, what are you gonna do?"

Me (blahblahblahblahblah): "What I'm going to do involves three things: First, it's going to be relaxing; Second, it's going to be enjoyable; Lastly, I'm going to make sure that it's cost-effective so I don't get into a deficit. Four weeks ago, I said I was going to do something - and I did. This weekend will be no different!"

On second thought, talking like this made me want to punch myself in the face. So, never mind.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Toilets R Us

I got a thing for cool looking toilets. What can I say? I'd like most of these to be in Barbie's Dream House except for that face-to-face absurdity. Go »

How Many Strange Businesses Can One Little Town Have?

Bowie is just a hole-in-the-wall kinda town but it's full of proud residents. I like it a lot. But man, we've got quite a few odd businesses. Go »

Christmas Post #17: Gadgets &Stuff

Cool collection of unusual stuff that would make memorable gifts. I swear I'd love to get my wife that toaster but I've heard too many horror stories of what happens to husbands who purchase appliances for their wives for Christmas. Think I'll wait for Valentine's Day. Go »

The Peak of Stupidity

By far, the stupidest thing I ever did was at my brother's bachelor party almost 40 years ago. The memory of it still haunts me. A group of his friends (around 25 - I knew some, but we had gone separate paths shortly after High School) met at the house of one his construction co-workers in the Maryland countryside. Go »

The Long and Winding Road

I've led my life with few regrets but those few have been big ones. I've posted a bit about my divorce but not about the reasons behind it. I'm not going to now either but I will say that Betsy deserved better at that time. Go »

This Year Goes to 11 contd.

What do the following people have in common? Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Wayne Gretzky, Melissa Etheridge, Eddie Murphy, George Lopez, Marilyn Milian, George Clooney, Michael J. Fox, Kim Deal, Boy George, Forest Whitaker, Barack Obama, Susan Olsen, Wynton Marsalis, Heather Locklear, Meg Ryan, Ann Coulter, and Steve West. Go »