"Heel, Heinrich!", commands the Governator.
"Kiss my grossly over-developed ass," snarls Heinrich in return.
Anyone ever heard of myostatin before? Not me. Good thing I have some - I can't afford tailored clothing.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Take Me Out...

It was baseball night in Bowie. As part of Lauren's tenth birthday celebration, we went to see the Bowie Baysox. Highlights of the evening included: Nearly getting nailed by a foul ball while distracted by getting pizza sauce off my pants. Go »

The Naked Samaritan

Recent conversation with Brenda: Brenda: Did I ever tell you I posed nude for an art class? Me: Really?! (after recovering from shock) I had a college friend who posed for some extra money. Go »

Where's Joe The Plumber When I Need Him?

Screw plumbing! This is friggin' ridiculous. When the toilet in my bedroom bath developed a leak, I assured my wife it was a simple repair to replace the fill valve. Go »

Double Talk with a Forked Tongue

I've decided that from now on, I'm going to answer every question like a presidential candidate. Friend (voter): "Steve, what are you gonna do this weekend?" Me (blahblahblah): "That's a great question and an important one. Go »

Be My Valentine

Valentine's Day will always have a special meaning for me. Seventeen years ago today, Brenda and I kissed for the very first time. It was an electric moment for me, one that I'll always remember. Go »

It's Still Rock and Roll To Me

Recent conversation with Brenda: me: I heard a song on the radio on the ride home today and found myself returning to the 70's. Brenda: Like you ever left. me: Be that as it may, I was bobbing my head to Journey's Lovin, Touchin', Squeezin'. Go »