Headline: Britney Spears goes bald.

I'm her publicist. My client has an album coming out soon. I see Anna Nicole Smith all over the headlines. I think, What in the hell stunt do I have to pull to get Britney back in the limelight?


Three Replies to Fuzzy Logic

Anna Gregoline | February 20, 2007
I think she's really losing it. Her ex is blabbing about their sex life, saying she cries after sex, she's in a divorce/custody battle with KFed, and her career is going nowhere. She exposed herself on purpose to be in Paris Hilton's club, and checked herself in and out of rehab in one day. Rumors of post-partum depression and plain old celebrity crazy are sounding possible to me.

Amy Austin | February 21, 2007
Britney-sympathetic/agreeing with Anna side:
Man, you're cynical, Scott!

Jaded/tired of Anna Nicole, too/agreeing with Scott side:
Well, it worked for Sinnead!

Anna Gregoline | February 22, 2007
Oh, and her nanny says that she doesn't know what to do with the kids, holds them for 10 minutes and says, "I'm done" and asks what to do when they cry. She's a celebrity, been one all her life, and everyone is out ot get her now, especially all of a sudden. I have a lot of sympathy.


Logical Operator

The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

Not to Be Confused with Denise Sawicki

It's been two months since I first mentioned my new love Denise on the site. She's overdue for a proper introduction, since I plan to continue mentioning her on a first-name basis around here. (I don't know why some men continue to tell me about their woman by calling her "my wife" or "my girlfriend" even though I've known her and socialized with her for years.) Go »

Illinois-a Will Destroy Ya

Today, I was asked to jot down some memories of living in Illinois. I thought about a topic and wrote: Some of what I miss most about Illinois is the delicious, filling food. Loose meat sandwiches at the Maid-Rite in Peru, chocolate shakes at the Steak ‘n Shake in Normal, deep-dish pizza at Pequod’s in Lincoln Park, monte cristo sandwiches at the Sunrise in Macomb, horseshoes at the Field House in Springfield, pecan waffles at the Waffle Company in Mt. Go »

New Neighbors Upstairs

STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP... Go »

Mile-High Hypocrisy

The homeowners' association in a Denver suburb is furious that one of its residents has dared to put up a Christmas wreath in the shape of the peace symbol. (link) Yeah. Keep reading till the end. Go »

The Proposal

By now, the news is out that Kelly and I are engaged. We couldn't be happier about it! Here's the full story for anyone interested. Go »

Rethinking Forrest Gump

Inspired by a conversation this past weekend, I've been thinking about the once-popular movie Forrest Gump. It has fallen out of favor with people who prefer its contemporaries Pulp Fiction and The Shawshank Redemption and believe it robbed them of Oscars, but to me all three films are good. Gump succeeds because of a lot of factors, but consider its acting and its visual effects. Go »