Headline: Britney Spears goes bald.

I'm her publicist. My client has an album coming out soon. I see Anna Nicole Smith all over the headlines. I think, What in the hell stunt do I have to pull to get Britney back in the limelight?


Three Replies to Fuzzy Logic

Anna Gregoline | February 20, 2007
I think she's really losing it. Her ex is blabbing about their sex life, saying she cries after sex, she's in a divorce/custody battle with KFed, and her career is going nowhere. She exposed herself on purpose to be in Paris Hilton's club, and checked herself in and out of rehab in one day. Rumors of post-partum depression and plain old celebrity crazy are sounding possible to me.

Amy Austin | February 21, 2007
Britney-sympathetic/agreeing with Anna side:
Man, you're cynical, Scott!

Jaded/tired of Anna Nicole, too/agreeing with Scott side:
Well, it worked for Sinnead!

Anna Gregoline | February 22, 2007
Oh, and her nanny says that she doesn't know what to do with the kids, holds them for 10 minutes and says, "I'm done" and asks what to do when they cry. She's a celebrity, been one all her life, and everyone is out ot get her now, especially all of a sudden. I have a lot of sympathy.


Logical Operator

The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

Day 14

In lieu of "weight loss Wednesday" since I'm much too busy on Wednesdays even to get online, let me write today that I'm on day 14 of a new diet, which is 13 more days than nearly all of my attempts last. This is, in fact, the second-longest I've ever lasted on a diet, and in a few weeks it will be the longest. This should indicate how lousy my self-discipline is and why I've ballooned to this size, around 450 pounds. Go »

More Free-Fallin'

A skydiver's chutes won't open, he falls 12,000 feet and survives with minor injuries, and the whole thing is captured on his helmet camera. (link) You have to click on the speaker to activate the sound. Go »

Something Comes Along to Intervene

I've been enjoying "Meddle" and "Remedy" by Little Boots, two great electropop songs with catchy hooks, perfect for summer. But I didn't really take her seriously as an artist until I heard "Stuck on Repeat." It's pop music on acid, like Kylie Minogue produced by Captain Beefheart, and the unlikeliest hit song of the year. Go »

Trial of the Century

I served on my first jury last week, for the gripping case of the Walmart Protein Bar Bandit, accused of a $1.46 theft. Voir dire was oddly focused on whether grazing (eating groceries before you pay for them) was acceptable, whether eating protein right after a workout is important, and whether any of us had strong feelings about the Walmart corporation. Go »

What Other Kitty Cats are as Good as You, the Bestest Kitty Cat in the Whole World, Yes You Are?

• none Go »

Humbug 4 Life

This isn't a very popular opinion these days, but it's from the heart: I'm getting terribly fed up with Christmas all around me, and being wished a merry Christmas dozens of different ways every day both verbal and non-verbal. Normally I think political correctness is a joke and the word "offended" is a thoroughly dead horse of a cliché, but I have no other word for how I feel than offended. I'm not Christian and want nothing to do with the holiday of Christmas. Go »