Headline: Britney Spears goes bald.

I'm her publicist. My client has an album coming out soon. I see Anna Nicole Smith all over the headlines. I think, What in the hell stunt do I have to pull to get Britney back in the limelight?


Three Replies to Fuzzy Logic

Anna Gregoline | February 20, 2007
I think she's really losing it. Her ex is blabbing about their sex life, saying she cries after sex, she's in a divorce/custody battle with KFed, and her career is going nowhere. She exposed herself on purpose to be in Paris Hilton's club, and checked herself in and out of rehab in one day. Rumors of post-partum depression and plain old celebrity crazy are sounding possible to me.

Amy Austin | February 21, 2007
Britney-sympathetic/agreeing with Anna side:
Man, you're cynical, Scott!

Jaded/tired of Anna Nicole, too/agreeing with Scott side:
Well, it worked for Sinnead!

Anna Gregoline | February 22, 2007
Oh, and her nanny says that she doesn't know what to do with the kids, holds them for 10 minutes and says, "I'm done" and asks what to do when they cry. She's a celebrity, been one all her life, and everyone is out ot get her now, especially all of a sudden. I have a lot of sympathy.


Logical Operator

The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

Ten Things I Learned While Kelly's Parents Pat & Russ Spent a Week Visiting Us

• Florida reminds me of Dave Barry's quip that vacationing in Britain is great because you meet people from entirely different states. We stopped a woman to take our picture; she was visiting from New Jersey and her daughter beside her was from California. The only local we met warned us what bridge not to jump off for swimming because the water is shark-infested. Go »

Only in the Web Era

Victim's cell phone is stolen on subway. Thief takes photos of his own wife, family, dog, and home. Cell phone automatically uploads them to victim's Flickr account. Go »

The Proposal

By now, the news is out that Kelly and I are engaged. We couldn't be happier about it! Here's the full story for anyone interested. Go »

Pigeon Panic

Since Adrianne doesn't permit replies to her posts, I'll link it here: Poisoned pigeons fall from sky in Texarkana. The chain of events is too bizarre not to reiterate: A pigeon flew into a bank and defecated on a customer, so the bank put poisoned grain on the roof hoping to drive away the pigeons. Instead, dozens of birds flopped dead on the ground downtown – right during the city's annual festival. Go »

The Honeymoon

After our wedding, it was time for Kelly and I to enjoy our honeymoon: Ten days in Los Angeles, San Francisco, and the coastline between them. We (really I, with Kelly's signoff) spent weeks researching and scheduling to pull it off, and the effort was definitely worth it, as we had ten days of bliss. We rode new rides at Disneyland, toured a movie studio and historic ship, saw whales and dolphins up close, ate lunch atop a mountain, hiked among the redwoods, explored Chinatown and Alcatraz, and along the way ate some amazing food. Go »

Milwaukee's Best

Today I learned a valuable lesson: Don't quote that line from Wayne's World about "mill-you-wock-AY" to a native of that city. It's like asking them to bring you a cheese wheel when they visit: You deserve a kick in the balls for it. I learned this while planning my visit to the city this weekend for beer, brats, Packers, and oh yeah, Matthew Preston. Go »