Headline: Britney Spears goes bald.

I'm her publicist. My client has an album coming out soon. I see Anna Nicole Smith all over the headlines. I think, What in the hell stunt do I have to pull to get Britney back in the limelight?


Three Replies to Fuzzy Logic

Anna Gregoline | February 20, 2007
I think she's really losing it. Her ex is blabbing about their sex life, saying she cries after sex, she's in a divorce/custody battle with KFed, and her career is going nowhere. She exposed herself on purpose to be in Paris Hilton's club, and checked herself in and out of rehab in one day. Rumors of post-partum depression and plain old celebrity crazy are sounding possible to me.

Amy Austin | February 21, 2007
Britney-sympathetic/agreeing with Anna side:
Man, you're cynical, Scott!

Jaded/tired of Anna Nicole, too/agreeing with Scott side:
Well, it worked for Sinnead!

Anna Gregoline | February 22, 2007
Oh, and her nanny says that she doesn't know what to do with the kids, holds them for 10 minutes and says, "I'm done" and asks what to do when they cry. She's a celebrity, been one all her life, and everyone is out ot get her now, especially all of a sudden. I have a lot of sympathy.


Logical Operator

The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

Bombed Back to the Jurassic Age

Judging from what happened to my car the other day, not only is there a species of pterodactyl still alive in Sarasota, but it's suffering from an outbreak of dysentery. Go »

All King and No Kubrick Make Jack a Dull Boy

I recently got to talking with friends who liked The Shining, both Stephen King's novel and Stanley Kubrick's film adaptation of it, but who were unaware that King has always loathed the movie, despite its reputation as one of the best horror films ever made. It's hard to imagine that a writer doesn't know his own work better than someone interpreting it, but I think this is one of those rare cases where the writer is just too close to the story to get it. Here are three reasons why I think Kubrick's film better understands the material, and is better overall, than King's novel: 1) In King's version, Jack Torrance is a fundamentally decent man who wouldn't hurt a fly, but who is down on his luck and desperate. Go »

Christmas 2016

After a hectic househunt and move, it was nice to have a family vacation to take a break from everything. The whole visit had already been planned back in the summer, and we had spent six months saving up plenty of money to pay for it, so all we had to do was relax and enjoy it. Kelly's father Russ and brother Andy, and Andy's boyfriend Joe flew in for a week. Go »

Weakened

A friend (new GOO devotee Aaron Weiss) once said he had read about a psychological study that found people don't feel like they've had a weekend if they didn't have free time on Friday night. That was my experience this weekend: At the office till eight, then sitting down with pizza and a DVD only to nod off on the couch by nine thirty. I may have woken up refreshed on Saturday morning, but there was this crushing feeling that the weekend was almost over, that sort of numbing dread you feel every Sunday night an hour before bed. Go »

WLW: No Payin', No Gain

My weight loss plan – which has become our weight loss plan, since Kelly intends to do just about everything I do – is on hold until I can recover from the move, which took my last penny and then some. On the bright side, I've been eating less since getting together with Kelly, and I burned what felt like a week's worth of calories during that move. We should start walking soon before we settle into a daily routine. Go »

Shoulda Seen It Coming

The news that Princeton's infamous ESP research lab is soon to close (link) is both heartening and a little disappointing. On one hand, if there's anything at all to ESP, then skeptics should have no objection to private donations funding some bonafide scientific research into it – no harm done except for a hint of legitimacy. On the other hand, this lab was a black bruise for Princeton and its "findings" were routinely debunked, and a facility investigating exceptional claims must have exceptional adherence to scientific standards. Go »