I was in my car stopped at a light after going to Giant when two jokers pulled beside me and made motions for me to roll down my window. They drunkenly started shouting, "Hi, Santa! What are ya gonna bring me for Christmas this year?"

I should have ignored them but instead replied, "Keep fucking with me and I'm going to have Rudolph shit in your stocking."

That only encouraged them to continue with slurred speech. "But I've been really good this year!"

"Look boys, I'm going to get you new tires for that really short bus you ride to school, I'm going to pay for that long overdue visit to the dentist, and I'm going to get you a gift certificate to the emergency room for after I kick both your asses."

Fortunately for them and me the light turned green and we went separate ways. Not the most festive thing I could have said but they really weren't as funny as they thought they were and, drunkenness aside, those Duck Dynasty rejects found a quick way to stand on my last nerve. Merry Christmas!


One Reply to Ho, Ho, Ho

Scott Hardie | December 24, 2013
Awesome. :-) Merry Christmas (sincerely) to you too!


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Information, Please...

Shortly after I obtained my driver's license, I got brave enough to travel a longer distance than the liquor store. I headed to Gettysburg, Pennsylvania to visit the historic battlefield. I had always been a Civil War nut (short of reenactments) and Antietam I had seen recently (someone else drove). Go »

Christmas Post #17: Gadgets &Stuff

Cool collection of unusual stuff that would make memorable gifts. I swear I'd love to get my wife that toaster but I've heard too many horror stories of what happens to husbands who purchase appliances for their wives for Christmas. Think I'll wait for Valentine's Day. Go »

Which Underwear?

Recent conversation with Brenda: Me: A friend of mine lost his wife a few years ago. He's not that old and dreaded entering the dating scene again but he was growing a little lonely. Brenda: Good for him - fingers crossed. Go »

Strange Dreams

I dreamt that I had died and gone to Heaven. Brenda lived a few more years and then she passed. When she got to Heaven, she saw me and ran to me with open arms saying how much she had missed me. Go »

Christmas Post #9: Black Friday And Other Spending Matters

The day after Thanksgiving is nationally known as Black Friday for its capitalistic excess associated with open season Christmas shopping. This site is devoted to giving shoppers advance notice of various stores' Black Friday bargains. A lot of these "bargains" are available online , sometimes exclusively. Go »

What Are We Gonna Do? Road Trip.

A brand new drug has come onto the market that is touted as being a treatment for autism. It's a homeopathic drug called Respen-A. It affects the malfunctioning areas of the brain typically associated with autistic children. Go »