Ho, Ho, Ho
by Steve West on December 13, 2013
I was in my car stopped at a light after going to Giant when two jokers pulled beside me and made motions for me to roll down my window. They drunkenly started shouting, "Hi, Santa! What are ya gonna bring me for Christmas this year?"
I should have ignored them but instead replied, "Keep fucking with me and I'm going to have Rudolph shit in your stocking."
That only encouraged them to continue with slurred speech. "But I've been really good this year!"
"Look boys, I'm going to get you new tires for that really short bus you ride to school, I'm going to pay for that long overdue visit to the dentist, and I'm going to get you a gift certificate to the emergency room for after I kick both your asses."
Fortunately for them and me the light turned green and we went separate ways. Not the most festive thing I could have said but they really weren't as funny as they thought they were and, drunkenness aside, those Duck Dynasty rejects found a quick way to stand on my last nerve. Merry Christmas!
One Reply to Ho, Ho, Ho
Web Junkie
Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »
Thanksgiving Memories
This year, as I stood with my nephew staring at the turkey carcass following its carving, I shared with him an anecdote about Thanksgiving when I was his age. I grew up in a fairly poor household but we always had turkey for the holiday. But it was a bit of an extravagance for us so my mother was committed to getting everything the bird had to offer. Go »Halloween Post #5: What Do You Mean You're Out Of Blood Colored Yarn?!?
Several goo site participants have demonstrable sewing skills. Anybody knit? For those who do and are in a festive spirit on a psychotic level, you might want to try your hand at these. Go »Flotsam & Jetsam
I always wanted to use that phrase. Crazy ticketers in England. Which anniversary is it appropriate to celebrate at this restaurant? Go »(Insert Movie Title)...in 30 seconds Re-Enacted By Bunnies
Not a new site at all but one I hope everyone will enjoy if you haven't already. If you've seen it before, hope you'll find something new. Very clever re-enactments if only for the editorial difficulty in condensing a film down to 30 seconds. Go »Isn't That The Red Skull In That Weird Pantsuit?
My internet idol, Uncle Scoopy, refers to Victoria "Posh Spice" Beckham as Skeletor Spice for her resemblance to that cartoon character. Interestingly, she resembles other cartoon characters often, depending on how she dresses. She has got to make Blackwell's "Worst Dressed" this year. Go »
Scott Hardie | December 24, 2013
Awesome. :-) Merry Christmas (sincerely) to you too!