Lauren the Builder
by Steve West on September 13, 2022

Here’s a truly heartwarming story about the bond formed between my 5-year-old daughter, Lauren, and some construction workers. I embellished it only slightly. It will make you believe that we can all make a difference when we give a child the gift of our time.
We lived in a house next to a vacant lot. One day a construction crew turned up to start building a house on the empty lot. Lauren naturally took an interest in all the activity going on next door and spent much of each day observing the workers.
Eventually the construction crew, all of them “gems-in-the-rough”, adopted her as a kind of project mascot. They chatted with her, let her sit with them while they had coffee and lunch breaks, and gave her little jobs to do here and there to make her feel important.
At the end of the first week, they even presented her with a pay envelope containing ten dollars. Lauren took this home to Brenda who suggested that she take her $10 “pay” to the bank the next day to start a savings account.
When they got to the bank, the teller was equally impressed and asked Lauren how she had come by her very own paycheck at such a young age. She proudly replied, “I worked last week with a real construction crew building the new house next door to us.”
“Oh, my goodness gracious,” said the teller, “and will you be working on the house again this week, too?”
Lauren replied, “I will, if those assholes at Lowe’s ever deliver the damn sheet rock.”
Web Junkie
Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

It's Saturday And You Know What That Means...
Shopping Day. I went grocery shopping earlier today because I had the afternoon free and I prefer to get it done when I have the chance as opposed to shopping at night because that's the only time available after a full day's activity. Added bonus: no UOAS. Go »
Christmas Post #3: Syphilis For Christmas
Lyme disease, E. Coli, and even Mad Cow are all available to gift your loved one with as a plush toy. Be sure to check the venereal section! Go »
Free Rice
Site appears legitimate. Help feed the world by using your knowledge of vocabulary and donate rice to feed the hungry. Visit the home page of this website for the details and other interesting data (link from the game page) or just play the game. Go »
It's Not My Fault
Recent conversation with Brenda: Brenda: Steven! me:Yes, queen of my soul. Brenda: The bathroom sink is full of whiskers. Go »
Killer Home Decor (Literally)
From chalk outline welcome doormats to dead horse head pillows à la The Godfather (with protruding tongue, no less), this website features decorations to give your home that perfect serial killer feel. I especially like the pooling blood carpet. Go »