Long Live Scott's Other New Car
by Scott Hardie on April 1, 2007

I never thought I'd write these words, but I'm the delighted new owner of a Hummer H2. It's all black, brand new in perfect condition. I've already got it tricked out with glowing ground-effects lights on the undercarriage and special extra-thick tires for off-roading. I can't wait to take it out to the track one night this week and drive a few laps in it.

However, because it's only eight inches long, it will be kind of hard to get in. It's not a real H2, just a radio-controlled model in the XMODS Evolution series from Radio Shack. (link) One of my coworkers put together a racing league for the little cars and trucks, and I went with the biggest, heaviest, and (so I read) fastest model in the set. They're fun to play with, they're fun to modify, and in our one exhibition event so far, they're fun to race against other drivers. However, they can be expensive, especially how quickly the H2 goes through so many batteries. Give 'em a look if you feel like trying something different.
Three Replies to Long Live Scott's Other New Car
Jackie Mason | April 5, 2007
[hidden by author request]
Scott Hardie | April 5, 2007
I highly doubt anyone is going to take up this hobby after this blog post, but I would feel terrible if somehow you did and I didn't warn you to throw the Radio Shack screwdriver into the trash and buy a real one at any hardware store. That damn screwdriver that comes with the car is a screw-destroying monster that nearly ruined my car permanently after only a few frustrating hours of use.
The first race was fun, but my tires kept coming off due to unforeseen implications of some changes I had made, and it became a running joke to see the tires go flying off the Hummer again. I didn't finish in any of four runs because of it. I'll have better tires next time for sure.
Logical Operator
The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

Pigeon Panic
Since Adrianne doesn't permit replies to her posts, I'll link it here: Poisoned pigeons fall from sky in Texarkana. The chain of events is too bizarre not to reiterate: A pigeon flew into a bank and defecated on a customer, so the bank put poisoned grain on the roof hoping to drive away the pigeons. Instead, dozens of birds flopped dead on the ground downtown – right during the city's annual festival. Go »
Dodgy
"Is that a Dodge Dakota pickup truck? I heard that Native American tribe is really upset at the commercialization of their name." "Yeah. Go »
Pico de Greedo
On Friday, my company threw a part Mexican, part Star Wars party in celebration of Cinco de Mayo and Star Wars Day ("May the 4th be with you"). It was a weird combination but it worked, with games like a lightsaber piñata bash. Kelly made "lightsabers" (pretzel rods frosted with blue and red frosting), but she really got interested when I mentioned that the salsa contest offered three prizes and only had three teams on the signup sheet. Go »
Breaking Monopoly
My latest pastime has been seeing if I can rig a video game of Monopoly to give me infinite money. It turns out that I can, but it's incredibly tedious, far more so than I thought. I like to play with the NES version, because it's just colorful and fun enough without being too sophisticated in its AI. Go »
R.I.P. Mom
You were so still in your bed when I could finally sit down beside you, a few hours after the facility notified me that you had died. I hadn't seen you be that peaceful in years, your eyes not scanning the room for clues, your hands not turning over each object in front of you for endlessly repeated examination. I whispered to you the most urgent and most precious things I had to say, the secrets and atonements and wishes foremost on my mind. Go »
Anna Gregoline | April 2, 2007
You scared me for half a second there!