Seeing a man in a kilt, the thought occurred to me, "Ha ha! I wonder if anybody has come up with 'upkilt' porn?" Then I checked online. Someone has, and it's not funny.

Reminds me of when Mel Gibson was shooting Braveheart and got up the courage to ask one of the burly locals what he was wearing under his kilt. The man glared at him menacingly and growled, "Your wife's lipstick."


Two Replies to Scottish Highlands

Aaron Shurtleff | April 25, 2007
Is that a true story, Scott, or is this another one of those great comebacks that turn out to be a hoax or an urban legend? The comeback seems too perfect to be true, but I can always hope it's true! :)

Scott Hardie | April 27, 2007
I heard Gibson tell the story on The Tonight Show. That doesn't answer whether it's true or made up, but it gives you a pretty good idea. :-)


Logical Operator

The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

Doppelgänger

I saw myself at the grocery. Tall, fat, shaved head, black collared shirt, black slacks, black leather shoes. I caught up to myself and muttered "I like the look" with a wink, and myself smiled, then myself's girlfriend saw us together and laughed. Go »

Crash

There are some dangerous intersections in our neighborhood, where trucks come barreling through after the light turns red. This morning, Kelly and I were waiting at the light when she dropped her sunglasses. "Fuck beans," she muttered, unbuckling her seat belt and leaning forward just as the light turned green. Go »

Pigeon Panic

Since Adrianne doesn't permit replies to her posts, I'll link it here: Poisoned pigeons fall from sky in Texarkana. The chain of events is too bizarre not to reiterate: A pigeon flew into a bank and defecated on a customer, so the bank put poisoned grain on the roof hoping to drive away the pigeons. Instead, dozens of birds flopped dead on the ground downtown – right during the city's annual festival. Go »

To the Victor Belongs the Spoils

If only I had $4000 to spare: Sopranos Pinball Go »

Mario in Hell

Classic video game fans have been modding their favorite programs for years to make insanely weird and difficult levels. What does it sound like to play Super Mario Bros. in Hell? Go »

All King and No Kubrick Make Jack a Dull Boy

I recently got to talking with friends who liked The Shining, both Stephen King's novel and Stanley Kubrick's film adaptation of it, but who were unaware that King has always loathed the movie, despite its reputation as one of the best horror films ever made. It's hard to imagine that a writer doesn't know his own work better than someone interpreting it, but I think this is one of those rare cases where the writer is just too close to the story to get it. Here are three reasons why I think Kubrick's film better understands the material, and is better overall, than King's novel: 1) In King's version, Jack Torrance is a fundamentally decent man who wouldn't hurt a fly, but who is down on his luck and desperate. Go »