For the last four months, I've spent Tuesdays at a bowling alley playing in a just-for-fun league. Score was kept, but the mood was friendly and non-competitive, except for one of my teammates who kept competing with us instead of the other teams. :-)

I struggled with it at first, partly because I thought I was signing up for a six-week league and it turned out to be a sixTEEN-week league, and partly because my skills had somehow diminished even though I'm in better shape now. I used to be a halfway decent bowler, earning 120-150 points per game, but in this league I was averaging 70-90 points per game and throwing a lot of gutterballs. It took me a month to make peace with the fact that I was just a worse bowler now, at which point I relaxed and started having more fun with it, although I did eventually get back up to my usual scores in the last few games. Instead of focusing on the points, I set a more modest goal of throwing at least one strike per night, which I managed to pull off every time. My best night saw maybe six strikes. At no point did anyone else in the league approach Chris's level; I think the highest score that I saw was around 245.

It was good to spend time with these guys. It started as a "work league" with two friends from my company, Joandy and Tom, plus Tom's partner Mark as our fourth player. Tom is a more serious bowler who I can tell has played for many years (he's the one who earned that 245 score), while Joandy is a competitive joker who can't help but kid everyone about their scores (and himself on the rare nights when he bowls badly), and Mark is a relaxed and friendly presence. Injuries and a pre-existing condition took a toll on Mark over the season, so Kelly took Mark's place on the team for the final month and was thrilled to get out and get exercise. She would have kept playing with Joandy and Tom in the fall league, but she's going to be busy working overtime. As for me, I'm opting out of future seasons to spend my Tuesdays on long-ignored projects, including a board-game meetup group that I really miss, since I haven't seen them since before the wedding. I had a good time bowling, though, and I'm glad that I did this.

The title of this blog post was my proposed (and rightly rejected) name for the team, which was said aloud on the first night. When Tom originally bought a bowling ball at the pro shop, they offered to make it a scented ball, and for whatever reason, he chose apple pie over other scents. We had fun trying to get Kelly to sniff his ball the first time she played: "No way! I know how guys do that! His ball stinks like sweat or something, and you're telling me that it smells like apple pie so that I'll put my face up to it and sniff, and then you'll laugh at me!" No, really: As creepy as it sounds, Tom's ball really does smell like apple pie.


Logical Operator

The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

The Serpent

This is the third of four weekly blog posts about diagnoses that have completely changed my life since the pandemic started, after The Dragon and The Tiger. 2020 was hard on all of us. We all lost friends and family. Go »

Get a Clue

Among hard-core board game fans, an argument has raged for years now over preferences for European-style games and American-style games. European games emphasize strategy, trade, and abstraction, while American games emphasize luck, conflict, and detailed themes. European games also strive to keep every player involved as long as possible, rather than eliminating them. Go »

Home is Where the ––– is

Just how convenient can future additions to Google get? (link) Thanks, Marlon. Go »

Scott's Pet Peeve #2519

Why do some microwaves have a convenient quick-start option if you press 1 or 2 or 3, so that they instantly start cooking with 1:00 or 2:00 or 3:00 on the clock... but DON'T have this same functionality programmed into 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, or 9, which do nothing when pressed alone? How does an engineer possess both the vision to provide the former and the lack of imagination that results in the latter? Go »

Where the Hell I Have Been All Year, Part III

This is a long story of interest only to friends of mine and people who really want to spend fifteen minutes reading about my life, but I've been promising to reveal this secret for the better part of a year and the time has come: Kelly Lee and I were a couple again this past spring. I kept it secret because A) it was difficult to tell the friends who had supported me during her breakup that we were dating again and B) for the duration of the relationship I didn't know where it was going and I wanted to know this before I said anything. Anyway, this story is solely my point of view and may not be fair to hers. Go »

Game Over

On paper, Game Over doesn't look promising: A vulgar, video-game-themed cartoon series on UPN that only lasted five episodes. But I rented it anyway, and somehow it managed to be entertaining and smarter than it needed to be, but maybe that was just the low expectations kicking in. I think the key to the show is that it actually respected its characters and cared for them as a family unit, instead of using them as empty vessels for punchlines (latter-year The SImpsons) or treating them with unmistakable contempt (Family Guy). Go »