Things stuck to the bottom of my internet shoe.

Things not to do while wearing briefs made of beef jerky. (Besides wearing briefs made of beef jerky)
Venezuelans believe children should not watch The Simpsons, offer more wholesome fare instead.
One way to nearly guarantee you'll never lose your wedding ring. I hope this is photoshopped (and when did this become an acceptable verb, anyway).

Flags of the world redefined with graphic legends.
USA
European Union
Colombia
China
Brazil
Angola

Lollapalooza 2008 lineup. Use the scroll icon on the webpage. Margot & the Nuclear So and So's, Flogging Molly, The Ting Tings, and The Weakerthans together at last.
Nerve.com's opinion of The 50 Greatest Comedy Sketches Of All Time. Video clips of most of them.
I showed this picture to my wife. She said, "Oh yes, that's our new remote."
More "Fun With Clouds"
Cool website that provides the position of the stars relevant to your geographic location on the day and time you input.
Stand-up of the week: Norm Macdonald


Three Replies to What'd I Step In?

Amy Austin | April 16, 2008
That wedding ring makes me want to hurl beef jerky. (Not speedos, just beef jerky.)

Steve West | April 16, 2008
That can't be real. Please God...

Amy Austin | April 16, 2008
I know why you'd want to believe that, but I don't know how you can... there are people who will pierce anything!


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

And Then the Fight Started...

When Brenda and I attended my High School reunion, she noticed me staring at a woman seated a few tables away, drinking glass after glass of some alcoholic drink. She asked if I knew her. I told her, "That was my girlfriend from back in the day. Go »

All Aboard The Idiot Train

I swear that lately, I feel like the proverbial snowball that inexorably turns into an avalanche. Yesterday, I was unloading the van of the last of the grass needed to complete the front yard landscaping. Only 170 square feet so it wouldn't take long. Go »

Coolest Home Theater Ever

Chance of impressing your friends: 100% Chance of getting laid: Somewhat lower. This is definitely going to be a part of Barbie's Dream House. Especially if it comes with a replicator. Go »

Crazy For You, Baby

Recent conversation with Brenda: me: You know how crazy I am for you? Brenda: Crazy enough to raise three kids. me: I'm crazy enough to ignore the voices in my head when we talk. Go »

Do Pumpkins Exist Outside Of These Fall Holidays?

They should. I love the taste of homemade pumpkin pie. I almost didn't marry Brenda when she told me she couldn't make one but I thankfully reconsidered. Go »

I'm a Doctor, Not a Kitchen Appliance!

My toaster has a timer on it that let's you know when it's finished. It seems a little silly to add a timer beeping that's a redundant addition to the toast loudly popping up from the machine that means the same thing. So now, because the timer emits a sound eerily similar to an EKG indicating flatline, every time it goes off I'll say to Brenda, "He's bread, Jim." Go »