Brenda woke up Saturday morning and said, "I just dreamed that you gave me a beautiful necklace for Valentine's Day. What do you think it means?" I told her, "You'll know tonight." Later that evening, I gave her a small package. Delighted, she opened it - to find Freud's 'The Interpretation of Dreams'. She gave me a gift last night - the loveliest burial plot you've ever seen.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Lost in Translation

Some ad slogans that had hilarious results when translated into other languages for international marketing. Go »

Public Service Announcement

For those of you who will be pulled over by the police and asked the inevitable question, "Because I'm smokin' hot" is not the correct answer to "Do you know why I pulled you over?" Live and learn. Go »

The Colossus Of Roads

I am getting so sick of commuter traffic. Forbes magazine has Washington, DC listed as #3 on the Texas Transportation Institute's Worst Cities for Traffic list and I can't disagree. The bulk of that rating comes from the deteriorating infrastructure within the city which doesn't affect me much. Go »

Real Baseball

I took the girls to a minor league baseball game last night. It was Autism Awareness night at the Bowie Baysox game which was the incentive for Brenda and I to go. The girls actually enjoyed the game for the first few innings but were more interested in the foods, carousel, moon bounce and face painting. Go »

Mean Husband... or Funny Guy?

Since Brenda is home and doing well, I will share yet another reason I will spend ETERNITY IN HELL. At the hospital, after her surgery and recovery, she began to wake up in the room. She was covered in a blanket up to her neck, and as her eyes barely fluttered open and she saw me standing over her caressing her cheek, I said, "Baby, something went wrong and they had to remove your whole body. Go »

Let Loose The Pigeons!

I got a phone call today from my Service Coordinator of Prince George's County officially welcoming me and my daughter, Olivia, into the Autism Waiver program - a state funded program intended for families with an autistic child offering funds for state approved services such as Aqua therapy, Occupational community trips, Speech therapy and even respite for Brenda and I. This has been a nine year wait since getting a diagnosis for Olivia at age 2. The waiting list is horrific. Go »