Bad Housekeeping | Tragic Comedy

If you're lazy like me, there's not a right time to put away the clean dishes. Who cares if you use them one-by-one out of the dishwasher? But there *is* a right time to discover that they're still dirty, and that's long before you're putting away the last couple of items after eating out of the dishwasher for days.

At least now I know why I spent the weekend going to and from the bathroom.

Five Replies to Bad Housekeeping

Jackie Mason | September 18, 2007
[hidden by author request]

Scott Hardie | September 18, 2007
I feel the same way. I'm lazy about cleaning up, so having friends over every weekend is one way that I force myself to keep the apartment clean. This dishwasher thing was a freak accident, and the realization that I'd been eating off of dirty dishes was a revolting "oh god... oh god..." moment, like waking up from a drunken one night stand and realizing it's your grandmother.

Amy Austin | September 18, 2007
Ewwww... that makes my face scrunch up involuntarily -- *both* of those thoughts.

Lori Lancaster | September 18, 2007
[hidden by author request]

Jackie Mason | September 19, 2007
[hidden by author request]

Logical Operator

The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

Flak Album

Lately I've been enjoying Aimee Mann's I'm with Stupid. Oh, how I wish she'd saved that title for a duets album. Go »

Jacked

It's good to be back online. We lost our Internet connection at home on Tuesday, and it has only come back on for a few minutes sporadically ever since then, just enough time to send a quick email before it vanishes again. Making sure goos got published in time wasn't easy. Go »

Day 14

In lieu of "weight loss Wednesday" since I'm much too busy on Wednesdays even to get online, let me write today that I'm on day 14 of a new diet, which is 13 more days than nearly all of my attempts last. This is, in fact, the second-longest I've ever lasted on a diet, and in a few weeks it will be the longest. This should indicate how lousy my self-discipline is and why I've ballooned to this size, around 450 pounds. Go »

Trial of the Century

I served on my first jury last week, for the gripping case of the Walmart Protein Bar Bandit, accused of a $1.46 theft. Voir dire was oddly focused on whether grazing (eating groceries before you pay for them) was acceptable, whether eating protein right after a workout is important, and whether any of us had strong feelings about the Walmart corporation. Go »

Stun the Ghouls

Lately, I've been playing in a Dungeons & Dragons campaign set in a desert wasteland. My character Bartok is a pacifistic monk; he can fight but always seeks peaceful resolutions. Nugget and Sven are the other PCs. Go »

Roger Ebert Should Lay Off the Facial Reconstructive Surgery

When Roger Ebert took ill last fall, I thought it would pass in a week like his previous cancer scares, and he'd barely mention it. Then he didn't come back to work for months, and I thought he'd announce his retirement, because it's really hard to go back to doing something full-time when you've rested too long, even if you love it like he does. Then he announced that he'd be present at his annual film festival this month, and I thought the recovery was done and he was about to return. Go »